Anonymous
by BelovedShadow
Summary: Itachi Uchiha is the publisher of Akatsuki magazine, and receives monthly entries from a robust young erotica writer calling them self "Tokumei" he is very curious about the mysterious "girl", but "she" is a lot closer to home than he thinks. ITASASU YAOI
1. Just How To Push My Buttons

**A/N: Sorry to plop another fic on top of my massive in-progress list. I know it sucks, but the idea for this one just popped up in my head and I had to get it out! **

**Enjoy! **

Itachi Uchiha sighed to himself and leaned back in his chair, thinking quietly without sparing a single glance towards the woman sat across from him.

"Ehm... Uchiha-Sama?"

"Quiet, Konan. I'm thinking."

"Hai."

He frowned slightly, and pinched the bridge of his nose, now leaning down and letting the weight of his head rest on his elbow. He glanced out of the window, and for a moment considered jumping out- only to remember that his office was only on the first floor. He was stuck. Completely stuck.

"Konan... what _exactly _does it say?"

The blue haired woman opened the file sitting in front of her, and flipped through the assorted pages for a moment before pulling one apart from the others and setting it atop the stack.

"It reads: Thank you for your concern, Uchiha-Sama. I appreciate when a businessman shows true care for his work. However, I must disagree with your opinion that my article is too crude. If you are unwilling to print my words as they currently are written, then I'm afraid I shall be unable to submit anything else to your magazine from now on."

The weasel let out an agitated groan and snatched the paper out of Konan's hands, reading it over for himself.

"We have to cut her segment. It's _too _raunchy." Itachi said, already expecting the next words from his secretary.

"Uchiha-Sama, the magazine can't afford to lose Tokumei-Chan's panel. It effects sixty percent of our sales margin."

"Well we can't _print _it the way it is! How long are we going to let this woman have the only unedited text? The _title _of her piece is already too robust for a magazine targeting sixteen to twenty-five year olds."

Konan frowned. "In all honesty, sir, it's not that bad. I myself am only nineteen years old, and I always pick up _Akatsuki _magazine and flip straight to her section. My boyfriend has been much more satisfied with our-"

"I don't want to hear about how this anonymous pervert is affecting your sex life. I've already heard about how great she is from my own mother, I can't stomach it from anyone else."

Konan blushed. "Gomen, Uchiha-Sama. You're so tough looking, I always forget that you're gay. Have _you _read Tokumei's articles?"

"Of course not. Never the whole of them, anyway. Just enough to see that they have no business being published." Itachi grumbled, but he knew that he was already defeated. He had no choice but to publish the anonymous articles. It was the only fail-safe income for the magazine. Tokumei didn't tell her real name, didn't give her real address, didn't ask for any money, and didn't try to branch out into any other section of the paper. She simply sent in her work, and requested that it either be published word for word exactly as she'd written it- or not published at all.

"Whatever. Publish it; but email her back and make sure she knows that she should tone it down next time."

"Hai." Konan said, bowing and exiting the office.

Itachi frowned and glared up at his clock. Lovely, he had an entire three hours left till he could go home and relax. At a second glance, he realized that Sasuke was just getting out of school. That brought a smile to his face, and he reached for the phone, quickly dialing in his adorable little brother's cell number. It rang a few times, then Sasuke answered.

_"Aniki!"_

Itachi smiled, glad that his otouto was so excited to hear from him. "Hey, Otouto. How was your day?"

_"It was fine. How was yours? You must be pretty bored, huh?" _

Itachi chuckled. Sasuke knew him so well. It was fairly rare for him to be bored at work- since he really loved his job- but on the moments when he _did _find himself unfocused and drifting, he had a tendency to contact his little brother and let off some steam.

"It's this damn Tokumei chick, again! I've been spending all of my energy on her today, now I just have to sit here for three more hours."

There was a soft giggle heard on the other side of the line, and Itachi knew that Sasuke was grinning. _"Tokumei sure does get you all ruffled up every month. Ne, Nii-San?" _

"She knows just how to push my buttons. Still, I can't help but admit that the magazine needs her. She's free, and she's a high attraction- but I still don't want you reading that filth, Otouto."

_"Of course not, Tachi. I prefer non-fiction to light reading anyway. Besides, from what I've heard, the Tokumei articles require another person's participation in order to truly enjoy them." _

Itachi frowned. In truth- he didn't even like that Sasuke _knew _about the perverted little section all the way in the back of the magazine. He himself was quite ashamed of it, and never promoted it. Still... people found it. Every month without fail, people found it. They always had lots of replies. Tokumei received all of her fan-mail directly through her own email address, but Itachi knew that it was loads.

"How was your day at school, Otouto?"

_"It was alright. Everyone's excited for your next issue to come out this Saturday. Is it ready yet?" _

"Yes. Just finished it up today. It's just gotta be printed and distributed. Takumei's starting to really push the perversity of her segments. She seems to be picking a fight with me."

_"Are you gonna stop publishing her stuff, then?" _

"I wish I could, but I can't."

_"Ah. Alrighty then, well I've gotta meet with Shikamaru and work with him on our homework, but I'll see you when you get home, kay?" _

"Alright. I love you."

_"Love you too, Aniki." _

With that, Sasuke hung up the phone, only to explode into a huge fit of laughter. Shikamaru looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

"It's not like you to be so goddamn jolly. Calm down and come do your half."

"Sorry, it's just, Itachi can be such fun, sometimes. Remind me to check my email before I leave."

The Nara rolled his eyes. "You _still _haven't told him?"

Sasuke smirked. "Takumei-Chan says the art of seduction relies on subtlety. Once you have the man quivering at your every movement- _then _you can confess your love."

"Tch. Don't quote yourself, Sasuke. It makes you look even more big-headed than you already are."

"I can't help but be smug, Shika. Itachi _needs _me to keep writing, or else he'll fail at his job and our parents will make him work for the police force. Don't you get it? Itachi needs _me_! It's the most ecstatic feeling I've ever had."

"It's not even like he knows Takumei's you. He thinks she's a chick."

"Of course he doesn't think it's me. I'm his sixteen year old kid brother. Why would I send him erotica every month and demand that he print it? His mind can't even comprehend that as a possibility. Besides, I won't _have _to tell him."

"Oh? Why not?"

Sasuke's lips curled into a mischievous grin. "Because, of course, I plan on _showing _him."

"You're gonna use the Takumei instructions for how to catch and keep a lover... on Itachi?"

"Yepp."

"Even though it's in his magazine."

"Yepp."

"Even though _you're _Takumei."

"Yepp."

"Baka..."

"I always get what I want. Just wait and see."

**A/N: You like? Please review... like... PLEASE review. If you're reading Reckless Abandon then take my poll. **

**I love you for reading!**

**-Beloved**


	2. Fantastic, Ticklish, Scandalous

**Fantastic Fellatio**

**By Tokumei-Chan**

_Hello darlings. Is your lover feeling a little down? What a shame. How about we go over some tips to improve your man's mood the next time YOU'RE feeling a little … "down." Did you know that the act of fellatio goes back to ancient times? That's right, lovers. Cleopatra herself was once rumored to have given the ol' suckaroo to over thirty of her soldiers all in the same night! It's an act so old that it's depicted in pre-historic cave paintings – so how is it that in all these thousands of years the human race hasn't established itself as a group of distinguished cock-suckers? Because most you poor unfortunate souls are doing it wrong!_

_Now that we're done with our little history lesson, I think it's time you ladies – or gentlemen ;) - learned to do it RIGHT. Now, this extends a little farther than just giving a good blow. You've got to set the mood correctly! Remember, my dears – oral sex is NOT the same as the other stuff you and your boy-toy do when the lights go out. There doesn't need to be any romance. No candles. No rose petals. The best way to discover that your cock is in someone's mouth – is exactly that. To DISCOVER it. That's right, surprise him!_

_Say, for example, you get a phone call from your guy saying that he's having a rough morning at work. Wouldn't it be just SO lovely for him to find you hot and wanting under his desk when he got back from his lunch break? Get simpler than that! It shouldn't even matter what he's doing, let him talk about whatever he wants. When you get bored (which you will) shut him up by dropping to your knees and kissing at his groin through his pants._

_Now that you know WHEN to do it, I think it's time you learned HOW. Just like the rest of the body – the penis' most essential point is the head. You can stimulate this with your lips, tongue, teeth (lightly), or pretty much ANYTHING else. Seriously, rub it against his dick and make it feel good – he won't care much what it is. Wrap your lips around it and give a good hard suck. Don't just stay there, though! Move your head back and forth against the shaft of his dick, to make sure he can feel that pleasure everywhere else! Also, lovers, it is absolutely IMPERTIVE that you not forget the existence of his testicles. With every lick you take they're filling more and more with his hot salty cum, so don't forget to give them an appreciative massage to let them know they're doing a good job. After all, you DO want that cum, right? I should hope so. I certainly think I'D enjoy a mouthful of spunk, but to each his own, I suppose._

_If you DON'T want to swallow it, savor it, or share it with a friend – try not to be so damn rude about spitting it! How would you feel if someone got one taste of YOUR fluids and gagged all over the place? You'd feel disgusting. Dirty, even. So don't make HIM feel like that. Let him bask in the afterglow, it's a wonderful thing._

_For those of you watching your weight – the serving size of most semen is one tablespoon, and is made up of twenty calories. So make sure to count that in your diet ;)_

_Until next time, you naughty little things!_

_**-Tokumei**_

"It's really not that bad, dear." Mikoto commented lightly, as she finished her read-through of her son's newest magazine.

Itachi frowned at his mother, and looked anywhere but at the flushed blush on her cheeks – first the coffee table, then the carpet, then the bulletin board next to the door. Oh, Sasuke had made honor-roll again? That was nice.

"Are you saying the magazine as a _whole _was acceptable, or are you so stunned from the last page that you've forgotten the rest?"

At this, the woman offered a soft laugh. She stood from her chair, and moved to sit next to her eldest child on the couch, kissing his cheek affectionately. "This monthly spat of paranoia really is _quite _adorable, Itachi. It's not that bad. Not nearly as terrible as you made it out to be. And yes, I'm only talking about the Tokumei panel, because I'm sure you already _know _that the rest is flawless."

Her son smiled. "Of course everything that I actually have the authority to control is perfect. Maybe that's what bothers me so much about it… I have no way of telling this woman what she can and can't say! What if she-"

"What makes you assume it's a woman?"

Itachi and Mikoto both looked up to see Sasuke stepping into the room, looking thoroughly delectable. He had been out with his friends Naruto and Sakura, practicing some sort of new sport that Itachi couldn't quite grasp. He thought it involved trying to climb trees with minimal usage of the hands. Whatever it was, Sasuke was sweating through his fitted-tee at the chest and armpits, creating a musk so deliciously manly and primal that the elder Uchiha son found himself repeating the mantra '_He's my brother. He's my brother. He's my brother.' _Over and over again in his mind.

An almost cruel smirk was now spreading across the teen's face. Seemingly as if he _knew _what was happening in his brother's mind and delighted in it. Itachi gulped in horror of that thought, and turned to his mother as she began to question him.

"Oh right, Tokumei _could _be a man, Itachi! After all, the articles never get really specific about anything vaginal…"

"I don't assume it's a girl because of the article topics. I assume she's a woman because she's such a _bitch._"

This was for some reason very amusing to Sasuke, as he entered the room fully, flopping himself out across his mother and brother on the couch. The matriarch of the Uchiha clan had always been very close to her sons. She always thought that men were meant to be firm and disciplinary, while women should be sweet and approachable. That was how she and Fugaku had raised the boys, and it had really helped Itachi not be so uncomfortable after one day blurting out that he also approved most of men when they were "firm" and that the mere thought of such an image encouraged _him _to become "firm" as well.

Still, out of all the Uchihas – Sasuke was by far the closest to everyone. His relationship with Itachi was… complex but close. He adored his mother, and had great respect for his father. It was not entirely uncalled for that he'd decide to sprawl across the others when he got home. But with all that sweat, everywhere? Ew!

"Sasuke, get up off of my couch!" Mikoto squealed, laughing a little as she attempted to bat the child off of her, and he hugged his arms around Itachi's waist in what appeared to be an attempt not to get shoved to the ground by his mother.

"Ah! Mom! Stop! You'll make me fall into the table!" Sasuke yelped out, pressing himself closer to their bodies, and giggling to himself as he realized that he was strong enough to disallow his mother from physically moving him.

"Go take a shower, you're filthy!" Mikoto countered, now moving her hands to the back of Sasuke's knees, and tickling him relentlessly. He squirmed more, and grabbed tighter to Itachi, then twisted around so that he was away from his mother's prodding hands and seated entirely on his brother's lap.

Itachi went stone still, as Sasuke wiggled around. His darling otouto pretended not to notice the change, and continued to struggle against Mikoto's tickling. He gasped out a desperate whimper as she managed to get a firm hold on one of his feet, and Itachi just about turned into a puddle on the floor.

This was sick.

The elder Uchiha son rose with a start, somehow knocking both his brother _and _his mother onto the carpet in a laughing heap. He rolled his eyes at them, as Sasuke bounced up, and returned to the couch, deliberately slinging himself over the arm-rest so that a sweaty armpit was pressed against the fabric.

Those two were clearly having quite a bit of fun. Meanwhile, Itachi was about two steps away from his bedroom – meaning two steps, a locked door, and a blanket over the head away from an emotional breakdown.

He was sexually attracted to his brother.

Fuck.

**XxBxExLxOxVxExDxX**

"Whoa! Guys! You can'tjust lurk in my room like that! What the hell?" Sasuke whisper-yelled to his friends, as he saw them lazily strewn about his bed. "Why are so many of you here anyway? I only invited Shika!"

One by one, Naruto, Ino, Sakura, Neji, Gaara, Sai, and Shikamaru looked up and noticed that their host had finally come to his bedroom. The last three were the only ones mannerly enough not to help themselves into the blankets, and they sat on the floor in the far corner, next to Sasuke's dresser.

"Well obviously we're all here to see how well 'plan Itachi' is going for you," Ino stated, blowing a large pink bubble with her gum, before sucking it back into her mouth with a loud _crack_. "You _did _tell us not to bother you all day because you devoted it to attracting his attention, didn't you?"

Sasuke frowned, and moved towards his bed, wordlessly shoving Naruto off so that he had room to snuggle in between Neji and Sakura. "I didn't have to do much. I played outside with Naruto and Sakura for a while, and worked up a sweat. Made my shirt cling like plastic-wrap. He couldn't keep his eyes off of me," Sasuke stated proudly, leaning against his brunet friend's shoulder as he released a yawn. "Then, he ran off to his room. I guess he's brooding. Meanwhile, I somehow got stuck playing _Monopoly _with my mother, and just when I was about to win, Dad came home and Mom insisted we start over so that _he _could play."

"Aw, fun! How come you didn't call _us _down! I whip serious ass at Monopoly! I could have wiped the floor up against three Uchihas, you guys are too frugal for your own good. You do have to _buy _the properties if you want to collect the _rent _you know!"

Sasuke was too tired to think of an insult for Naruto, so he chose his second most used approach and ignored the blond entirely, choosing instead to nuzzle closer to Neji, and try to imagine that the room wasn't full of gossipy teenagers and he could _sleep. _

"Sasuke, you're getting very close…" Gaara commented, looking up from a conversation he'd been having with Sai and Shikamaru and darkly eyeing the Uchiha's proximity to the Hyuuga.

"Mm… don't mind me, Subaku. We're just cuddling," Sasuke reassured, with a smirk. "Trust me, I recall what it feels like when we're doing something more robust – this is definitely _not _it."

Gaara glared, but managed a slight upturn of the lips when Sakura whomped Sasuke on the head for his rude comment.

"Don't tease Gaara like that, Sasuke! You know how possessive he is!" She whisper-screeched in mock fury, trying to hold in a laugh when Sasuke asked if Gaara would like to grope him in order to assure that he was truly un-aroused.

Naruto stuck a finger in his mouth and made a gagging noise, pretending to be disgusted by such blatant homosexuality. No one believed his disgust, though. It was well known that although _ now _Naruto had been dating Hinata Hyuuga for nearly three months – when he was still _single _he wasn't exactly opposed to receiving a blow job from another boy. Hell, it was rumored that on occasion he'd even given a couple embarrassed licks in return!

"Sakura-Chan, I need to get you back home by midnight…" It was Sai who said it, and Sasuke almost wanted to smile at him. Sai was a quiet boy, and didn't have the best of a mouth when he put it to use – but one thing was certain. He was completely devoted to making sure that he and Sakura had the perfect relationship. This was nice to Sakura, because she was the type of woman that doesn't need an excuse to be doted on. She happily kissed her friends goodbye, and allowed her boyfriend to help her out of Sasuke's second story window and down the cherry blossom tree that conveniently grew right outside of it.

"It _is _getting a bit late…" Ino murmured, looking towards Shikamaru in hopes that her boyfriend would also offer her chivalrous assistance in escaping the bedroom. He nodded to her.

"If you're tired, you should go." Shika stated in monotone – although it clearly translated as '_Climb down the damn tree by yourself.' _

She left in quite a huff.

Sasuke rolled over on his back, and spread his legs out, taking advantage of the space on the bed without the girls. This also, thankfully, helped Gaara not to feel so tense about his closeness with Neji – so conversation came easier afterwards.

"So, Teme! What's all this about you and Itachi? I mean I get the seduction part, but Shikamaru said you're using the Tokumei articles for it?" Naruto tilted his head to the side in confusion. It was almost cute, except that one- he wasn't Itachi. Two- he was an idiot. Three- he wasn't Itachi.

"Yeah… about that… that's kind of why I only invited Shikamaru."

"Explain." Neji said in deadpan, looking at Sasuke suspiciously.

The Uchiha, forever flirtatious, grinned at his ex-boyfriend seductively. "Is that a _request_, or an _order_?"

"Sasuke's Tokumei." Shikamaru stated simply, not keeping his eyes open long enough to feel the impact of the glare his best friend was sending him for ruining the fun.

"Scandalous," Neji commented with a smirk. "Although I will admit that one of the scenarios in the _Terrific Tongue _article hit a little close to home. Now I feel like I should have known."

"Excuse me, _love, _but would you mind _not _talking about Uchiha's tongue while you're in bed with him _in front of me_."

Neji sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Gaara, how many times do I have to tell you that I am _not _going to cheat on you with Sasuke. He _did _break up with _me, _you know."

"That's right, Subaku. I've moved on to a different long-haired over-ambitious sadist. I have no further interest in yours, I promise."

Naruto finally straightened up his head, and frowned. "Honestly, Gaara – why do you even _come _here with Neji? Him and Sasuke are like this all the time!"

"Being in a relationship with a sadist requires a fair level of masochism." Gaara answered, letting out a hopeless sigh.

"Okay, that's it. I'm sick of all your annoying questions, and lazy dozing, and snappy attitudes. All of you are _officially _kicked out of my room. See you tomorrow. Good riddance."

One hurt expression, one shrug, and two smirks later, Sasuke was alone. With the new-found quiet of his home, it was easy to hear Itachi's gentle breath through the wall. Although, perhaps gentle wasn't the word…

Itachi's breathing was desperate and ragged, and it didn't take much of a guess for Sasuke to imagine what he was doing. He sat next to the wall that connected their rooms and tried to suppress a groan, as he heard his own name on his brother's lips. He felt a shiver go down his spine, and knew that he'd soon be mimicking his brother's actions – probably with similar thoughts.

Neji's words were ringing in Sasuke's ears as he slipped his shorts off and began to touch himself.

_Scandalous_, indeed.

**A/N: I am SO sorry that this chapter took so long! I have no idea why I didn't update this sooner! You guys could have reminded me or something o.O **

**Anyway, How did you like the chapter? Hopefully you enjoyed. Please let me know what you thought with a Review! **

**I love you all SO much for reading. **

**Until next time, **

**-Beloved**


	3. Toe May Toe, Toe Mah Toe

"Good morning, Tachi-Nii," Sasuke said brightly, grinning at his elder brother as the man dragged into the kitchen and sat down in his routine chair. The Uchiha's had a square dining table in their kitchen, and a formal dining room to the side. They had breakfast in the kitchen most days, and Itachi always sat across from his father, between his brother and mother.

This particular morning, Fugaku was glaring daggers at his eldest son from over his Sunday paper. Clearly, he'd read the latest issue of _Akatsuki Magazine._

"Morning, Sasuke. Mother, Father." Itachi sighed tiredly and sunk farther into his seat – not even bothering to serve himself the remaining omelet on the center plate, or any of the toast or sausages.

"Fantastic fellatio, Itachi?" Fugaku question with a harsh tone.

Sasuke giggled. "Nice, dad! I didn't know you were serving blow jobs for breakfast, but if that's the case – I'll take two!"

"You will go to your room, and you will remain there for the next hour." Mikoto said softly before her husband had the chance to offer a more horrid punishment for Sasuke's inappropriate statement. Itachi was half trying not to run away from his furious father, and half trying not to laugh out loud.

Sasuke pouted and trudged off to his room. Itachi was quite certain that were either of his parents to check on Sasuke in ten minutes, they'd find his window open, and the tree overly abused.

"Mikoto you're too easy on him. I got a call from his math teacher again, yesterday. She said Sasuke's been taking rather a lot of _notes_, even during periods of class when they should be doing practice problems."

The Uchiha matriarch sighed. "He's still acing all of his language and literature based courses, Fugaku. I think it's good that Sasuke's a writer. We've never had one in the family before, and with Itachi being a major editor, he already has guaranteed publicity if he needs it."

"Honestly, mother. I doubt that Sasuke's writing would ever be featured in _Akatsuki. _From what I've seen he does mostly romantic poetry, and there's no room for that in an informational publication."

"Yet you find space for _porn _at the back of every issue!" Fugaku yelled angrily, and thumped his fist down on the table, shaking the silverware and almost knocking over Mikoto's glass of orange juice.

Itachi took a deep calming breath.

"Father, I have already explained to you that the Tokumei panel effects sales too much to be dropped. I was certain that when you agreed to butt out of my career choices as long as I paid you adequate rent for continued usage of my bedroom here, the implication was clear. Your decision to allow me to walk a path separate from yours does not mean that you are then permitted to dictate my every move like some sort of GPS device."

As expected, Fugaku stormed out of the kitchen in a huff. Itachi merely rolled his eyes and grabbed Sasuke's still half-full plate, deciding to finish off his foolish brother's food before starting on his own.

The doorbell rang.

"I'll get it, Itachi. You keep eating."

Mikoto rose from the table, and placed a small kiss on her son's forehead before stepping into the living room and opening the door. Itachi could practically _hear _the warm smile that he knew was on her face as she greeted their guests.

"Well hello there, kids! Great to see you. Sasuke's been grounded for the next hour, but feel free to wait downstairs or come back."

Itachi rolled his eyes. Those brats would, of course, wait here and wreak havoc on the entire first floor. Sasuke's group of friends was the most insane clique of high-schoolers that Itachi had ever come across, and that was saying something , considering that _his _friends in school had included a cross-dresser, an albino, a sadist, and two people so addicted to body art that it was a sin. One was obsessed with tattoos and had managed to overlap his skin so many times that he looked like his entire body was covered in blue ink, and the other just didn't seem know when to stop getting piercings. Sasuke's friends really weren't _that _odd individually. It was when you got them all _together _that it seemed an apocalypse was near.

They entered the kitchen as a collective force. Four of them on the three remaining chairs (the two girls lapping up) One shuffling through the cabinets and refrigerator shamelessly, and one passing a skillet to another – who was turning the stove on.

"Hey, Itachi!" The blonde one said, tossing a bag of cheddar cheese and a loaf of bread over to the read head, who began setting up several cheese sandwiches, then passing them off to a long-haired brunet so they could be grilled.

"Hello, Naruto and company. How are you all this morning?" Itachi asked politely, although he couldn't care less.

"Hungry!" The girls answered in unison, and Naruto nodded along in agreement, still digging around through the fridge.

"Hey, where do you guys keep the tomatoes?"

Itachi shrugged. "Otouto hides them."

"I'll get them," The long haired brunet offered. That kid had always irked Itachi. He had no idea why. Sasuke claimed that Neji Hyuuga was his best friend, and yet at one point… there had been something very fishy about it. Why did Neji know where Sasuke's stash of food was if Itachi himself didn't?

"Could you get up for a second, Sai?" Neji asked, and Sai rose from his seat. Neji took the chair, and moved it over a few feet, then stood on it and pressed up one of the ceiling boards. "Gimmie a hand, Koi?"

Itachi's eyes narrowed as he watched the redhead climb up onto the chair. So. Those two were lovers. Meaning that Hyuuga was gay. Itachi did not approve of this new development. He was impressed with his brother's cunning, though – when he saw the two boys pulling a mini-fridge out of the ceiling. How the _hell _did Sasuke get the damn thing up there?

They managed to pull the fridge down and set it onto the counter. When they opened it, Itachi saw that his little brother had secretly stored several bottles of ketchup – a few jars of tomato sauce, some tomato paste, at least ten fresh tomatoes, and endless cans of tomato soup.

By the time they'd finished raiding the kitchen, (spaghetti, grilled cheese sandwiches, and chicken nuggets) Sasuke was racing down the steps. He froze for a moment at he spun into the kitchen – having smelled the spaghetti already and expecting to reprimand Itachi for making it without him. If he was mad at his brother _then – _his fury that his friends had raided his personal stash was immeasurable.

Itachi found it quite … endearing … the way his darling adorable baby brother screeched and ranted.

"- and Neji! You fucking _know _better!" Sasuke continued, bellowing away at his traitorous companions. "Twice in one weekend, I lick ketchup off of-" Gaara sneezed loudly, having gotten too close to some lemon zest, which he was allergic to – and Sasuke was drowned out for a moment, preventing Itachi from hearing the end of that sentence. "And you don't get the fucking idea that maybe I _like _the damn stuff and keep it hidden away for a _reason_?"

Neji smirked. "Like what, Sasuke-Chan? Tomatoes, or my-" Apparently having taken a sudden interest in smoothies, Naruto turned the blender on at that exact moment, and Itachi was seriously starting to get irritated. Much as he was loathe to admit, he found himself inexplicably intrigued by his little brother's late night trysts with the Hyuuga boy.

"You see, Neji, _this _is why I never let you-" Shikamaru's chair scraped loudly against the marble kitchen floor as he stood to accept a banana smoothie from Naruto. "-because you're such a fucking bastard!"

"Oh, is _that _the reason?" Neji asked, looking very deliberately at Itachi – which, now that Itachi noticed, _everyone _was doing. It was clear that whatever Sasuke had not allowed Neji to do, _he _was the reason for it... but he had no idea what it was. Stupid chairs and blenders and allergies!

The argument awkwardly died down, with the teens still stealing strange glances at Sasuke or Itachi every couple of seconds. Itachi was uncomfortable with it, but Sasuke was waiting for Naruto to attempt tension diffusion. It wouldn't be long now...

"So," The blond began, grinning cruelly at Sasuke. "Who's tried out those new tips from the Tokumei article?"

"I read it before it was published, actually – but have no plans on trying anything from it."

Itachi's glance snapped up at Shikamaru and raised an eyebrow, clearly not knowing that exclusive viewings of passages from his magazine were being given out before the publish date. "Gaara's cousin is dating your employee Konan's best friend. So we've all got instant access with enough bribery. Hope you don't mind."

Itachi didn't mind, and (thank god) accepted this explanation as true. It _was _true. Konan was friends with Deidara, who was dating Sasori, who was related to Gaara. However – that didn't have a damn thing to do with the reason for why Sasuke's friends read the Tokumei panel before it's publication.

"How about _you_, Itachi-San?" Sakura asked with a daring grin. "Get any fantastic fellatio recently?"

Sasuke watched with a smirk as his brother went red as a tomato – but then again, tomatoes always _were _his favorite food.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Sorry that this update took so long D:**

**I've been working on other crap (as you've probably seen, I guess...)**

**If you're following my other stories, look for an update of _Hematite_ and _Room 234 _later this week.**

**PLEASE REVIEW OMG I NEED THEM!**

**Love you xD**

**-Beloved**


	4. MiniChapter

**A/N: I thought the last chapter was a bit too short, so I've decided to add on this random mini chapter to clip onto the end of it :) **

"You think Fun Felching Is a bit too robust?"

Shikamaru shrugged. "I think that when Itachi hunts Tokumei down with murderous intent, he_ might_ be surprised enough at what he finds to spare your life... Perhaps."

"I'd better save that one for later, then. Ravenous Rimming, Astronomical Anal, or Marvelous Massage, then?"

Sikamaru stared at Sasuke as if the answer should be obvious. "Tell me, Sasuke. How opposed are you to the idea Itachi turning to a life of homicide? You seem quite keen on your existence meeting an untimely end."

Sasuke merely grinned, and his fingers began clicking away at his laptop keyboard. "Can you Wikipedia a history of anilingus for me, please?" He asked, turning towards his best friend and motioning to the desktop computer that the Nara was half playing spider solitaire on, half napping in front of.

Shikamaru sighed and rolled his eyes, wondering how long it would take before Itachi's head blew up. Perhaps he'd at least learn to give a good rim job just before he died, though. He closed out of his game and opened up Google Chrome, knowing better than to muck around with internet explorer when Sasuke was in such an impatient mood.

"Nothing on history, just lecturing about all the STD's and other health risks come with the attractive bits."

Sasuke smirked at that. "Fear not, sweet maiden," Shikamaru had no idea who the fuck Sasuke thought he was calling a sweet maiden, but it damn sure must not have been anyone in _this_ room! Sasuke continued. "We homosexuals have accepted the possibilities of sexual infections and diseases with open arms. We're like... Like the Justice League! Fighting STD's and STI's hand to hand, tongue to tongue, cock to arse, or some times, hand in arse, cock to tongue, or even on occasion, hand to cock, tongue to ar-"

"Super heroes. Got it. Anyway, Wikipedia doesn't have anything on rimming history, even if you _do_ cross reference it with the justice league. So what are you gonna use for your opening?"

If anything, Sasuke's smirk only widened. "My own personal history, of course. Two in the morning is the perfect time to call Neji right? Pass me my phone, Shika."

The Nara obediently passed over the mobile device, saying a silent prayer to himself that whoever ended up murdering Sasuke understood his lack of involvement in this whole scandal and didn't see fit to pin any blame on him as well.

* * *

><p>Friday was a night that Gaara Subaku always spent with his boyfriend. Their parents were used to the frequent sleepovers and never questioned it, even though Gaara knew that on some nights the Hyuuga estate must have been <em>vibrating <em>with the deliciously loud sounds his lover made in the throws of pleasure. Maybe they just thought he was wanking... Wanking with Gaara in the room... To thoughts of Gaara ... Thoughts of Gaara fucking him harder ... Okay, so his family probably _did _ know what was going on, but they didn't show it.

Not three minutes ago, Neji had been letting out one last shuddering moan of release. He was now happily entangled with Gaara's limbs, enjoying an hour of post-coital bliss before they had another round.

But the phone rang. Stupid electronics... Gaara snapped it up from the end table and glared at the caller ID before answering it. "What?" he hissed.

"Gaara! How sweet of you to answer Neji's phone for him. I was just calling to ask your boyfriend a few questions about his arse hole in relation to our tongues. Could you pass him the ph-" Gaara smashed his thumb so hard against the screen of Neji's phone where it said _end call _that he almost broke it.

"Who was that?" Neji asked in a lazy tone, pushing some of his hair out of his face as it threatened to warrant him an audition for the new _Grudge_ film.

"No one." Gaara snapped back, and Neji snorted.

"No one meaning wrong number calling, or no one meaning Sasuke said something sexual?"

Gaara refused to answer, which was better understood than an actual answer, to Neji. He chuckled and pulled his lover's body on top of his. Gaara raised a nonexistent eyebrow at the gesture, knowing that missionary wasn't deep enough for Neji's liking.

"I'm _yours_, Gaara." Neji said, and alas Gaara understood. It wasn't about sex, it was about _his_ right to hover over Neji in such a dominant way, whenever he wanted. Neji was_ his._ Neji's body was _his_. He grinned.

"That, you are."

And they kissed, and it seemed to last for hours, although later, judging from the time it took to get from Shikamaru's home to the Hyuuga estate, they would calculate that it had actually been roughly seventeen minutes. Then Sasuke opened the door with an obnoxious grin, jingling his keys to the house at Gaara tauntingly, as if still having keys also gave him a right to burst into Neji's bedroom at will. Which, to Sasuke, it probably did.

"Things between you two getting heated up, then?" Sasuke asked, casually plopping himself down on the bed. "Great," The Uchiha continued, not waiting for an answer as Gaara glared at him with hatred and Neji ignored him completely, kissing at Gaara's neck as if they were still alone.

"Anyways, Gaara I'd like for you to perform anilingus on Neji tonight, if you don't mind."

Gaara didn't mind, but also didn't want to be told by Sasuke. He opened his mouth to say so, but was interrupted.

"I'm sure you'll enjoy it, he's quite responsive and has a very sensitive perineum."

Gaara almost childishly blurted out that he'd already noted that for himself, thank you very much, and did not need Sasuke telling him how to please _his_ lover, god dammit! But he didn't. It would be pointless anyway.

"Neji, while Gaara's rimming you, please fill out this survey," Sasuke produced a sheet of paper seemingly out of nowhere. "And rate him from one to ten on the following subjects." Sasuke handed him another paper. "Then when he's done please write a brief paragraph on the pros and cons of receiving oral sex from Gaara in relation to from me. Just send it over in the mail when you're done, Itachi's weird friends are gonna be over this weekend and I'm avoiding the house so I might not get it if you just drop it off. Remember, anilingus! I've already done an article on fellatio! After that, I consent any penetration that may be inspired... okay, I think that's all."

Gaara, scandalized, did not hesitate to promptly shove Sasuke off of the bed and point at the door, giving the Uchiha a menacing glare. Since he was already done anyway, the raven saw no issue in complying to Gaara's wishes and exiting the bedroom.

However, when Sasuke got his mail that Sunday, he noted with satisfaction that Neji _had_ completed the survey anyhow. He walked down the block to Sai's house and read over it. Lovely, he pulled out his laptop, sitting boldly on Sai's porch and not much caring who was home, then opened up Microsoft and promptly began typing up his latest Tokumei article, almost laughing aloud when Itachi called him.

"Nii-San?"

"Sasuke what are you doing right now? I thought I just heard you at the house..."

Sasuke smirked. "Writing up an article for a magazine an acquaintance of mine is involved with. You?"

Itachi was so hurried that he barely heard what his brother had said to him. "My friends are ... _Deidara put that **down**! ..._ just leaving, so feel free to come home any time."

Sasuke giggled girlishly as he continued typing whilst listening to Itachi fuss at his comrades. "Okie dokie, Aniki. I'll be home by dinner. Let me just finish this up."

Itachi hung up as Sasuke looked over what he'd written so far. He shook his head at his brother's stupidity and continued describing rim jobs to the best of his ability. When he finished, he pressed send, and got back into the house just in time to hear the AOL man telling Itachi he had a new message. Sasuke plopped down on the couch and counted to thirty, then grinned as Itachi's audible ranting about what is and is not appropriate reached a new level of profanity.

**A/N: Don't be lazy! Review this one too! xD **

**Love you for reading **

**-Beoved**


	5. Tokumei is a Woman

"Konan, just kill me."

Konan had seen her boss in some terrible moods, but this had to be the worst by far. His head was banging against his desk more often than not, and every time he looked at his computer screen, his skin turned a sickly shade of lime. He was now seated beside his office window with his face mashed up against the glass, looking out at the street as if he'd be glad at that moment to have an office on a higher floor with a larger window.

"Itachi-San, you always overreact. I'll admit Tokumei might have been a little more robust in her choices for this months topic, but-"

"A little more _robust_?" Itachi asked, shooting out of his chair furiously. "This is a magazine that targets _women! _What the hell is a _woman _going to do learning to give a _rim job_?"

Konan blushed, and looked pointedly at the wall next to Itachi instead of Itachi himself. "Honestly, sir … Tokumei is so... er- _detailed _ with the description that I doubt anyone will much care about whether or not it applies to their personal life."

Itachi groaned. Lovely. A bunch of smut-crazy fangirls would become addicted to an _informational magazine. _Why the hell had this chick picked _his _magazine to publish her whoreish articles in anyway? Where the hell did she get an idea like that?

"Konan, you've got to cut the article. We'll lose our _decent _clients if it gets published the way it is."

"Honestly, Itachi-San, I don't think that's the case. This is, by far, one of the best article's Tokumei-Chan has written. It would be horrible not to publish it."

Itachi, if possible, only fumed farther at the words that were meant to be encouraging. "Email this _Tokumei _woman and tell her that I demand a meeting face to face."

Konan nodded, and went to compose an email to Tokumei's personal address, explaining as tactfully as possible that Itachi had some mild concerns with the most recent article and would like to meet for lunch at her easiest convenience. Within the next ten minutes, she had a reply.

_Konan, _

_It's very considerate of you to care so much for Itachi and for your job, and that is not unappreciated. However, I think that you and your boss are misunderstanding the positions that you play in this little game. Mr. Uchiha's demand to meet me in person is neither rational nor necessary. If he does not publish the article exactly as I wrote it, he can rid himself of my services henceforth. _

_Thank you for understanding,_

_-Tokumei_

Fuck. Itachi would be all kinds of pissed to see _that. _It was bad enough that they had mutual friends without realizing it … what with their shared friendship with Deidara and Sasori... she was afraid of what would happen when Itachi picked up on that. He hated working with people who knew him personally, and Deidara wouldn't understand the word 'secret' if it were spelled out with a clay dictionary. Ugh. This job was just _too _hard – unless Konan could call in some favors … She smiled slightly at her new plan, and returned to Itachi's office.

"She'll meet with you later today for lunch, Itachi-San."

Itachi nodded, clearly pleased by this news, and Konan slipped out of the building, hoping to get this ploy set in motion as quickly as possible.

**XxBxExLxOxVxExDxX**

"Konan made Sasori do _what_?" Sasuke asked in near hysterics as he sat down to lunch with his friends.

Gaara smirked, glad that if there was _one _thing he and Sasuke enjoyed together it was the misfortune of other people. "Made him cash in on some favor and find her an actress to play Tokumei-Chan, since apparently the _real _Tokumei said something that could have risked Konan her job."

Sasuke snorted and rolled his eyes. "Oh? And what happens when this actress agrees to edit the article and I _don't_?"

Gaara shrugged, casually amused as he munched at his sandwich before frowning down at it and smiling when Neji automatically passed him the salt shaker without needing to be asked. "I expect that then Konan _and _the actress would lose their jobs in that case, but the actress will probably be given strict instructions to be as much of an arse as possible."

Sasuke grinned, not without noticing the obvious jab at his personality. He stood, without his tray, and walked boldly up to a table of girls whose giggling immediately transformed to embarrassed blushing and aversion of eyes as he approached. He offered a heart warming expression and held out a hand. "Would a couple of you lovely ladies come on a little date with me this afternoon?" Sasuke asked in what he knew to be his most charming voice.

And so, it was that when Itachi was sitting down at what was apparently a _Soul Food Bistro _(as if _that _made any sense) he was bombarded by a hoard of teenage girls – and his brother. Sasuke was glad to know that Itachi had come here. It was his brother's usual place to go when stressed, and apparently that didn't change just because he was meeting someone.

The actress was dressed in an offensively sultry manor when she entered, and Sasuke rolled his eyes. Even if Tokumei _was _a woman, she would _never _dress like that. He pouted at her, and his fan-girls didn't fail to realize that.

"Is something wrong, Sasuke-Kun?"

"Is that woman bothering you, Sasuke-Kun?"

"What should we do?"

"What do you need, Sasuke-Kun? Please feel better!"

He frowned theatrically at the woman and looked back towards the crazy teenagers that he had come to love and hate depending on the moment, right now – he rather appreciated them. "She broke my heart," he said in what he knew was a very deeply hurt tone.

That was all it took. Four simple words, and the fan-girls pounced like a puma. Like _thirty _puma's actually. Sasuke took a casual seat across from his brother, wondering if Itachi would gather that he actually _was _meeting Tokumei for lunch as Konan had promised.

Itachi was, of course, just as dense as usual. It was a mystery to Sasuke how this man had the highest IQ in Konoha. Perhaps book-smarts just weren't everything in the real world.

"Fancy seeing _you _here, Nii-San! You should be at work, shouldn't you?" Sasuke asked as the place quieted, his fan-girls clearly having deduced that the woman who'd broken his heart had to be removed from his presence and questioned to death elsewhere.

Itachi frowned. "I'm meeting someone. Why aren't you at school?"

Sasuke shrugged with a grin. "Someone seemed to be given a false impression about whether or not I agreed to date them. I'd have felt bad just standing them up."

Itachi nodded along as if this made perfect sense, and Sasuke seriously thought he might have to take out a tape measure just to see how _thick _Itachi was.

At just that moment, Naruto burst in. "Sasuke! Those girls are outsi-" He broke off mid-sentence, and noticed Itachi.

_Please don't be stupid, please don't be stupid, please don't be stupid. _

Naruto clearly was ignoring Sasuke's inner mantra. "Oh! Sasuke did you tell Itachi that y-"

"No! I didn't!" Sasuke snapped, cutting Naruto off furiously. It was too late, Itachi wasn't fooled. He raised an aggressively curious eyebrow at Sasuke, and as Gaara and Neji entered the restaurant, they heard their raven haired best friend tell one of the most insane lies in the universe.

"I'm … uh … I'm transsexual. I know I was born in this body, but I just … feel like I should have been a woman. I'm going to start taking estrogen after I speak to Mum and Dad about it."

Itachi stared at him, wide eyed, and Sasuke tried to ignore Neji's painfully amused smirk, and Gaara's cackling. Naruto had fainted, thank god. He knew this was a far reach, but it had to be a lie that was insane enough for Itachi to feel uncomfortable checking up on it's likelihood.

"Sasuke … I … I didn't know. This must be so hard for you..." Itachi reached his hand across the table and held Sasuke's in his.

Oh lord, now he had to deal with Itachi when he felt like being a supportive big brother … fuck. Sasuke didn't know if he could keep a straight face through all of this, but he would if he had to.

"No, no, it's not hard. I'm still the same person. I'm still your brother. I'll just … I'll just be your sister some day." Oh _god _why the hell had he blurted out _this _of all lies?

Itachi sighed. "I'm so sorry, Sasuke. I'd always just assumed that you were flamboyantly gay..."

_I am! I'm flamboyantly gay, and openly in love with you! Ugh! _Sasuke told his mind to shut up, and just nodded along. "Well, I do like men, just … as a woman." Did that make sense? Nope. Probably not at all. At least Itachi wasn't a tranny, so he couldn't prove that Sasuke was doing it wrong.

Heaving a tired sigh, Sasuke made a silent vow to make Konan's life a living _hell _from that point on.

**A/N: Don't kill me, I promise there's reason behind this insanity - and no, Sasuke's not going to change at all. **

**Please review! **

**I love you a lot! **

**-Beloved**


	6. Exfoliating One's Arse Hole

**Ravenous Rimming**

**By Tokumei-Chan**

_Hello darlings. When was the last time you broke a sweat? Never mind, I don't care. Go take a shower anyway. Back from that shower? Go take another with your man, and make him wash everywhere. When I say everywhere, I don't mean everywhere visible to the naked eye. No, no – I want your man to go brush his teeth, clean his ears, scrub out his belly-button and make sure that every other hole in his body is in pristine condition, because tonight, you'll be putting your tongue someplace very, very dirty. _

_Wondering where that filthy place may be? I'll give you a hint – about thirty percent of ejaculate is made here every time your man cums. Need another hint? A lot of guys completely ignore this particular body part until it gets cancerous? Another? Although this gland is not always stimulated during sexual activity, doctors predict that without its existence, human males would be unable to have an erection. _

_That's right! I'm talking about the prostate gland! Stop looking at me like that, I mean it. The prostate gland is very important in the male anatomy, and not just because of the prostate fluid in discharge. The prostate also serves as the male g-spot. If you don't know what a "g-spot" is, then you're probably too young to be reading this article. _

_Stimulation of the prostate can have your man panting and squirming around like a little slut in mere minutes, but that's not the only thing I'm here to talk to you about. Before you get to actually inserting something into your man's rear-end, I would suggest lots of pleasure in his usual erogenous zones: neck, ears, nipples, penis, perineum, testicles, and so on. A lot of guys like anilingus as an accompaniment with fellatio* or stimulation of the penis with the hands. I, personally, would suggest beginning with fellatio and simply moving lower down. Press your fingers and/or tongue against the sensitive spots on his testicles and perineum before gently massaging his anus. This should be done first with the tongue. Lick against his anal cavity in the way that you would a melty ice cream cone that you were trying to prevent from dripping or tipping too far to one side – with gentle pressure. _

_If he responds well to this (positive response could range anywhere between a slight twitch somewhere in the pubic area to an all out spasm or audible sound of sexual contention) then try to lubricate the inner walls of his anus. The safest way to do this is with your tongue, because if you don't know where to position a lubricated finger you may hurt him. Press your tongue firmly against his anus, allowing it to slip inside. The prostate is located one inch inside of his anus, so you should be able to reach it with your tongue. If not, then with his consent you could try lubricating a single finger and probing him farther._

_Once the prostate is located, massage it firmly. Don't be shy about how hard you press against it, because the more pressure you add the closer to orgasm he will get. There are many men who can ejaculate through nothing but stimulation of the prostate gland, and for heterosexual men: No, that does not mean he's gay. Gay men and Straight men have just as many physical similarities as any two people who are of the same gender, and receiving anal pleasure should not be a threat to any man's masculinity, whether it's a girl with her tongue in his butt or another man. _

_Again, this is a very easy way to contract an STD, so practice with a safe, clean, and trusted partner! _

_Until next time, you naughty little things! _

_**-Tokumei**_

_*see last weeks article "Fantastic Fellatio"_

Neji Hyuuga raised a perfectly arched eyebrow at his ex boyfriend as he peered over the newest addition of _Akatsuki _magazine. "Explain to me where my survey was at all relevant to this article?" He asked.

Sasuke looked up from his own copy of the magazine, having been looking over carefully to make sure that it was unedited. "Hm? Oh, that would be the part where your survey inspired me to masturbate, which relaxed me enough to overcome a nasty little spat of writers block."

Shikamaru rolled his eyes and thanked every god he could think of for the simple fact that Gaara wasn't here and it was just the three of them. Neji chuckled, and smirked at Sasuke.

"I see, well in that case – you should have listed me as a source. Masturbation is a very important element of publication, don't you think?"

Sasuke grinned back at him. "Always has been for _me._"

Shikamaru sighed and pinched at the bridge of his nose tiredly. "Sasuke, I really don't want to hear about you slapping the salami, okay? It's bad enough you're making me your personal editor as if I have nothing better to do with my time."

Neji looked sarcastically at his lazy friend. "I'm sure you mean that you could have your head in the clouds, eh, Shika?"

The strategist shrugged. "Ino says she wants to help me _fine myself _or some such nonsense."

Sasuke snorted. "The only thing Ino wants you to _find _is her cli-"

"Otouto did you finish the orange juice?" Itachi called out loudly from the kitchen, causing all three boys to jump slightly, having all forgotten that he was home and right downstairs.

"Yes, Nii-San, but there's a can of the instant kind in the freezer!" Sasuke called back, before tilting his head slightly as if he couldn't remember what he'd been saying before that. Shikamaru was grateful for the distraction. It was bad enough that Ino was almost _guaranteed _to try and give him a rim job now, having one of them follow Sasuke's sexual advice was plenty to be annoyed about without _him _getting it.

Almost as if she'd been telepathically summoned, Shikamaru's cell phone alerted him that his girlfriend was calling. "Yes?" He asked in what he hoped was an acceptable voice.

Neji and Sasuke both tried not to laugh as they listened to Shikamaru's side of his conversation with Ino, which consisted mostly of "Yes, I will, okay, alright, sure, I did" and other simple ways to convey that he was a well trained dog. He sighed as he got off of the phone.

"Ino needs me to help Sai bring home Sakura's new dresser from the furniture store. See you Monday?"

Sasuke marveled at Shikamaru's patience. What business was it of his if Sakura bought a new dresser? That was Sakura's problem! But nope, she'd dragged her own boyfriend _and _Ino's boyfriend into it. Typical woman. This was _exactly _why Sasuke preferred men. Oh, that and cocks, delicious _juicy _cocks...

"Hello? Earth to Sasuke!"

"What?"

"You were daydreaming about being surrounded by penises again, weren't you?" Neji asked, standing with his hands on his hips like a reprimanding mother.

"Yes." Sasuke deadpanned shamelessly. "What were you saying?" Sasuke noted that Shikamaru had left while he was spacing out.

"That you need to hurry up or you'll be late to that meeting you were telling me about. You said it's at two, didn't you?"

"Oh, fuck! Right!" Sasuke quickly hopped up and ran over to his dresser, sliding a jumper on over his T-Shirt, and shoving his feet into his trainers even though they were still untied. He then promptly ran downstairs, not caring that Neji was still in his bedroom, and managed to collide with Itachi, sending them both to the ground.

Itachi grumbled and pushed Sasuke off of him. "The hell, Sasuke?"

"Gotta go! Bye!" Sasuke said, rising from the floor as fast as he could and sprinting out of the house. Alas, he reached the _Spring Wednesdays _cafe with time to spare; but – as he'd suspected, even though he was early, the person he was meeting arrived before him. Sasuke sat down across from his date and smiled apologetically, even as eyes looked at him with un-withheld disgust.

"You look like a _man, _Sasuke."

Sasuke sighed. "I was in a hurry, so when are we going to start doing this?"

"As soon as possible," The person across from him said in that light airy feminine way that he had of speaking. "You can start by using something _decent _to wash your face with. I could see your pours from across the restaurant for god's sake. You have a blemish on your left nostril – would you _die _if you tried to _exfoliate _for once in your life? That hair style won't do either. Parting it like that brings too much notice to your abnormally large forehead. Try to let some hang in the front. Oh, lord, and that's just your _face. _Heaven help the rest of your appearance, and don't even get me _started _on your mannerisms."

Sasuke grinned. It was very rare for anyone to feel comfortable pointing out all of his flaws, but Haku was someone who did it without a second thought. Because of his lie to Itachi, Sasuke was meeting with Haku every Saturday now until he learned how to properly behave as a transgendered individual.

"Okay, new hair, new face wash, what else?"

"First, we eat, and Sasuke Uchiha if you consume one _single _calorie above your daily two thousand I'll cane you to death – then we'll go shopping." Haku said matter-of-factly.

Sasuke couldn't quite recall what gender Haku had been born as, but as long as he'd known the guy, he or she had been trapped somewhere in between. He _did _have a dick though (unimpressive as it _was _with all of the female hormones) which made him man enough in Sasuke's book.

"Shopping for what?"

"Clothes. Unless you think that a woman trapped in a man's body would be content to swing through the jungle in a loin cloth with the apes – which is what you're dressed for _now._"

Sasuke shrugged. "It worked for Jane, right?"

The look he got from Haku inspired no further argument.

"Clothes, shoes, hair, oh – we'll have to do something about that smell, also."

Instinctively, Sasuke lifted his arm and sniffed at his armpit. "I smell like generic bar soap and deodorant."

"Exactly. Like a man."

Sasuke frowned. "You know, I will still be trapped in a _man's _body, won't I?"

"Honestly, with your attitude you'd have been better off telling Itachi that you _were _a man trapped in a woman's body and you've already had the surgery – because you do not at _all _think like a woman, and I doubt it's an ability that you'll manage to possess even when this is all through."

Sasuke glared. "I can't tell him that I was born in a woman's body, you dunce. He's my _brother _he _knows _I'm a boy!"

"Well, if you're going to have _that _attitude about this whole thing, then count me out!"

Sasuke sighed. "Okay, sorry. Fine. I'll cooperate – but even if I have to be a woman, make me as macho as possible. Itachi's still _gay. _He's not going to stay attracted to me if I turn into a chick."

"Perhaps you should have considered that before you blurted out to him that you _are _a chick. Because that's what you are from now on, Sasuke. You. Are. A woman. Deal with it."

Sasuke gave up arguing with Haku and obediently ordered a low-calorie meal, promising himself to pig out on starches and fried things when he got home just to spite the damn bastard. As Sasuke took a slow sip from his glass of _Coke Zero _he started to wonder what the hell he'd gotten himself in to.

**A/N: How was this chapter? Good enough for me to go the fuck to sleep, hopefully. I'm exhausted! **

**Please review and take my poll and junk. **

**Love you for reading! **

**-Beloved**


	7. Birthday Licks

**Warning: Citrus Fruits**

Itachi leaned back in his bedroom and sighed, staring hatefully at his calender and frowning at it. It was his birthday – _again. _Ugh, he was absolutely disgusted. He had no idea what it was about him that made his family so cheery about the idea of him being a year older, but the tedium of the whole affair had pestered him quite early on in life.

Last year had been relatively tame, he'd managed to convince his mother that he wanted to go on a silent trip with his boyfriend at the time, and he'd done exactly that. His boyfriend at the time had been his left hand, and they'd quite enjoyed each other on their holiday in Kyoto. Kisame thought it was shameful that Itachi was so sexually disinterested, but Deidara insisted that Itachi's left-handed masturbation technique even though he wrote with his right was a sign of true genius and sexual savvy.

Itachi had no opinion of it whatsoever. He'd slept with many men in his time – including Deidara himself at one point, which was how the blond _knew _his hand of choice – so it wasn't like he was a blushing virgin or anything. He just refused to enter a sexual relationship if someone couldn't please him better than he pleased himself... and was therefore almost always without a steady sexual relationship.

Perhaps it was irrational to wish for a lover that could just _know _how to touch you even more than you did – but Itachi had a nagging suspicion that he would find someone like that some day. As he mulled it over, his mind for some reason insisted on reminding him that as children, Sasuke had always been able to find all of his tickle spots with a natural ease.

His frown deepened.

"Itachi, darling, at some point today we really would like to at _least _take you out to eat, dear."

Damn them all! Itachi glared at his door, despising his mother's natural ability to tell when he was awake. Well, perhaps that had been an aid when he was an infant, but now it sucked.

"Okay, mother. If you don't mind dinner, then? I'm not going to be ready in time for brunch."

She responded in exactly the way he expected her to, rambling about how it was his day and of course they would go to whatever meal he wanted, and how she was so grateful that she didn't have to fight him for his time this year. Alas, her rambles ended and the hallway silenced.

He was lying back with his eyes closed, when he noticed that his door was opening, and then closing, and now there was someone in his bedroom. He opened his eyes up just a sliver, lazily trying to figure out who it was based solely on their blurry shape.

Sasuke, definitely Sasuke. He'd recognize those curves _anywhere... _fuck. That was not a good reason to be able to identify one's sibling.

"Something wrong, Otouto?" Itachi asked, opening his eyes properly and having to blink several times before he recognized the changes in his brother. Wow... this was... nice.

Sasuke's skin was perfect. He had no make-up on or anything, but apparently that Neutrogena stuff that Itachi had spotted in the bathroom was doing its job. His brother seemed to be emitting a healthy and natural glow. His hair was shiny, and looked like it would be silky to the touch, and he was wearing it slightly differently now, with some of it hanging in the front, giving his face a bit of a mysterious look. He was dressed in nothing but a pale sky-blue bathrobe and pink house-slippers, but somehow the casual homey attire suited him in a way that pleased Itachi beyond his understanding.

Sasuke looked like somebody's house wife.

Itachi could tell that the boy was watching him as he took it all in, and he knew that his gaze had probably turned hungry as he noted the way Sasuke's robe hung just slightly open to expose the creamy flawless skin of his upper right thigh. The robe shifted when Sasuke walked towards the bed and sat down, grinning at Itachi and crossing his legs – seeming to be _deliberately_ exposing more of that sinful skin.

"Do you like it, when I'm dressed like this?" Sasuke inquired, looking at Itachi in a way that could only be described as teasingly hopeful.

"I do. Why do you ask?" Itachi asked in return, gazing at the child with calculated inquisition, not sure if they were standing on some uncrossable line, or if Sasuke had in fact crossed that line already when he came in here so scantily clad.

"Because I like it when you look at me like that," Sasuke responded, letting his eyes stare into Itachi's in a way that was somehow so passionate that Itachi found himself mentally calculating the most subtle way possible to either turn onto his stomach or move his pillow onto his crotch. He didn't have time to do either, as he saw Sasuke's eyes flicker down to the tent his cock was making under his sheets, and then back up to his face.

The teen's grin widened. "Do I really excite you so easily, Nii-San?"

He cocked his head playfully to the left, and watched Itachi's eyes as they watched his tongue darting out to lick his lips.

"Why are you here, Sasuke?"

Sasuke ignored the question at first, instead opting to shamelessly pull Itachi's covers and sheets off of the elder Uchiha's body, and run his fingers down his brother's obnoxiously well-toned chest and abdomen. "Dad's out making reservations for your birthday dinner, and Mom's gone to pick up what she ordered as your birthday present," Sasuke started, kicking off his slippers and climbing onto Itachi's bed properly. "Everyone's off to see to your birthday this or your birthday that," His hands went to Itachi's thighs, and the elder Uchiha was surprised at how easily he spread them without question. "So me, I'm here to give you your birthday licks."

Itachi had the distinct impression that his brother was not about to punch him in the arm.

He was right, Sasuke did no such thing. He settled between Itachi's legs, and hovered atop him, then gave a very slow and deliberate lick to Itachi's neck, tracing all the way up from the curve of his shoulder to the crevice behind his ear, where Sasuke bit down gently on the lobe and whispered "One,"

Itachi shivered, refusing to question the contact. Sasuke sucked at his ear deliciously, refusing to stop until he heard a low rumbling in Itachi's chest. He smiled, and licked again, this time going back down that same path – but then lower, along the line that separated Itachi's pectorals, then across to his right nipple, sucking it into his mouth and biting down with a perfect amount of pleasure, causing Itachi to gasp, even as Sasuke lapped comfortingly against the now slightly-wounded flesh. "Two,"

His tongue attached itself to Itachi's skin again, and went lower, tracing the lines of Itachi's abdominal muscles, before burying itself in his navel, tonguing the tiny cavity boldly, and chuckling as he felt Itachi's stomach tense up in a clear attempt to stop himself from arching closer to his little brother's touches.

"Three," Sasuke muttered, as he hooked his thumbs under the elastic waistline of Itachi's boxers and pulled them off, letting his exposed cock bounce up freely. He could see the lust in Sasuke's eyes as the child stared hungrily at it, before taking it in hand and pressing it up to Itachi's belly. He then licked at Itachi's perineum, dragging his tongue over the sensitive spot, and letting it come to rest just under Itachi's sac, then sucking Itachi's balls into his mouth, moaning in satisfaction at the feeling of the heavy plumpness against his tongue.

He suckled them with a tortuous slowness that seduced an actual _whimper _from Itachi – something the elder decided he would deny if Sasuke ever brought it up again. With a soft pop, Sasuke released Itachi's balls and smirked up at him. "Four,"

Sasuke licked up the underside of Itachi's cock, tracing the thick vein there and gasping in delight as he felt the intensity of Itachi's pulse. He wrapped his mouth firmly around the head and twisted his tongue around it in a circular motion, then swept it over the slit, and pulled up.

"That's five, Aniki – but I'm enjoying this so much that I'm afraid I might lose count. Would you be terribly opposed to just counting in your head while I finish up down here and letting me know when to stop?"

Itachi had to open and close his mouth several times before he settled on a silent nod, feeling the warmth of Sasuke's chuckle against his painfully aroused penis.

Then, so suddenly that he didn't even have time to moan, his entire length was down Sasuke's throat. He felt Sasuke swallow against it, and he was already shamefully close to orgasm just from glancing down and _seeing _his brother's precious little face surrounding his cock.

Sasuke bobbed up and down, palming half-gently at Itachi's balls as he did it, and letting his other hand slide up Itachi's body and rub soundly against his chest. When Sasuke simultaneously squeezed at his balls with one hand, swallowed around his cock with his throat, and pinched a nipple with his remaining hand – Itachi felt himself release into his sibling's mouth.

Sasuke seemed completely unphased by this, and he swallowed every drop, then pushed off of Itachi's body and grinned. "Happy birthday, Nii-San."

Itachi just blinked at him for several moments, then finally opened his mouth to speak. "I don't …. why?"

Sasuke shrugged. "I find that fellatio is something best done as a surprise."

That rang a bell somewhere in Itachi's mind, but he was too sated to play connect the dots and think about where he'd heard something like that said before. Sasuke seemed able to tell this and he snorted, amused by something that Itachi was thus far unable to comprehend.

He got up and put his slippers back on, then stepped out of the room as Itachi thought he heard him muttering about how thanks to stupid Haku he could only have 1,980 more calories that day.

**A/N: Mkay, that's this chapter! HAPPY BIRTHDAY ITACHI, I FUCKING LOVE YOU! **

**-ahem- **

**Please review :D **

**All my love for reading, **

**-Beloved**


	8. Feeding Frenzy

**A/N: Sorry for the extreme delay! You guys get a taste of a different side of Itachi in this one, but I think you'll either love or hate it. **

**Enjoy!**

Itachi realized, now, that perhaps when he was deciding where to have his birthday dinner and had announced that it truly didn't matter where they went – he'd made a mistake. Because, clearly – any place but this place would have been a better idea.

"Is it too spicy, Itachi? Mine doesn't have as much berbere if you want to trade," Mikoto said in her sweet voice.

Itachi shook his head, only half-hearing his mother. At that moment, he had eyes only for Sasuke. Or, rather, the delicate and obscenely sexual way that Sasuke was licking lentils off of his fingers at that moment. His brother's thick eyelashes fluttered for a moment, before deep onyx eyes met his, and Sasuke smiled. It was a breathtaking expression, as if he genuinely hadn't known that Itachi was watching him and was truthfully glad to have discovered it.

"Don't you like Ethiopian food, Aniki? You could have spoken up, otherwise …" Sasuke looked pointedly towards Itachi's still completely full plate. This was supposedly 'modern' Ethiopian dining. Everything was still eaten with the fingers, but rather than sharing all-out, everyone was served individually.

Sasuke's eyes got very heavy, then, and his gaze became intense. "I've tasted yours, it's ... _delectable_." Sasuke looked downwards in a way that Itachi was sure his parents would assume to mean he was glancing at Itachi's _plate –_ Itachi knew otherwise. "Would you like to try mine? I've never had it before myself, but from what I've heard, it's quite the experience."

How their parents were managing not to catch the innuendo here was beyond Itachi's comprehension. Maybe, though, it would be because his parents hadn't had their cocks in Sasuke's mouth literally an hour and a half before sitting down at this table.

"I wouldn't want to deprive you of your food, Otouto," Itachi answered, breathlessly. "If you decide you can't finish and want to box it up, though – I'd be glad to steal a taste once we get back home."

The younger Uchiha's grin widened, and Fugaku scowled.

"We come out here and spend all this money and you'll faster eat your brother's left-overs than your own damn food!"

Something in Sasuke's eyes seemed all at once to die and flicker to life, as if he was being shoved out of some sort of trance. He looked up at his father, seemingly unsettled by the man's presence, and Itachi wondered if maybe – for a few moments – he had been the only thing left in Sasuke's world. It was a nice thought to have, since that happened to him quite often when lost in thoughts of his brother.

Not wanting to question Sasuke in front of their parents, and not wanting to question Fugaku _ever –_ Itachi resolved to simply eat his food. But not without one more tease at his brother. After all, what were brothers for if they didn't get you all flustered up in the most awkward of moments.

"If you were wondering, Otouto – I've tasted mine before, as well. You're right. It's delectable."

Sasuke promptly choked on his lentils. His eyes widened and then narrowed when Itachi snorted at him in amusement. Either Itachi had somehow totally missed the sexual tilt to their conversation or Itachi had _eaten his own semen _before, and holy fuck was that hot or disgusting?

Sasuke couldn't decide. His forehead creased as he thought about it. On the one hand, ingesting ones own bodily fluids was gross … but what if he had licked it off of someone else's fingers? Sasuke closed his eyes and pictured it, Itachi's delicious tongue, swiping warmly over his hands – so slutty and fucking eager for a taste of that salty bitter essence that he didn't even care whose it was...

If Sasuke's jeans weren't so tight, the table might have risen a few inches.

He had no idea how it was that he made it through dinner, but he managed somehow, though not with an entirely aware state of mind. By the time they were home, and their parents were asleep, Sasuke already knew exactly what he wanted to do, so he made his way down to the kitchen to retrieve his box from the restaurant.

Upstairs, Itachi was sitting on his bed, waiting. He did not know exactly what it was that he was waiting for, but he did know his little brother well enough to know that he wouldn't be waiting for long. True, he and Sasuke's sexual relationship had literally only started earlier that day, but if he were to be honest with himself, it certainly hadn't come out of nowhere. How many times had they sat, with their backs pressed to the wall that adjoined their rooms, grasping their own cocks in hand and pretending that they had no idea the other person was doing the same. He knew every hitch and whisper of Sasuke's breath when the boy was aroused and trying to contain it, and he knew that Sasuke had been at least half-hard all the way through the last half of dinner.

He also knew that Sasuke still hadn't touched himself, choosing instead to wait in silence until they could hear their father's deep snoring, and then leave his room and go downstairs. For a single, fleeting moment – Itachi had feared that Sasuke was going out to someone else to deal with a 'problem' that Itachi himself was to blame for, as far as he knew. But then, he recalled two things at once: Firstly, if Sasuke was going to sneak out, he'd have done it via his window-tree. Secondly, and more importantly, Sasuke wasn't the sort who did things without knowing what he was doing. He had a habit of playing with fire, yes – but he had yet to be burned, and there was a reason for that.

The little shit was a master manipulator, and a seductress besides. That was easy to see by the way he handled his friends. If Sasuke's plan was to swallow a throat-full of his brother's manhood and then act like it never happened, he wouldn't have been such a little slut at dinner, and if he wasn't going to act like it never happened, then his all-or-nothing personality only left one alternative option: They were going to talk about it. Maybe not with a lot of words, but Sasuke wasn't going to let this incident just fizzle away as an awkward morning and leave it at that. Oh no. For whatever reason, he'd set his sights on Itachi, and he'd hunt him actively from then on, like the predator he was.

Of course, Itachi was very willing, as far as prey go. He was fascinated by Sasuke's fascination with him, and even more than he loved looking into Sasuke's eyes, he was growing to love the look _in _Sasuke's eyes when he looked back.

There was a soft knock on his door, and Itachi smiled. "Yes?" He asked without hesitation.

Nothing could have prepared him for how beautiful Sasuke looked in that moment, because he hadn't seen Sasuke looking so normal in so long. There was no 'glow' from a light powdering of make-up. There was no glitter of bronzing lotion, no distinctive smell of grapefruit from face wash. No fuzzy robe, with matching pink slippers, no hair parted to accent his best features. Sasuke was presenting himself as himself, wearing one of their Dad's old T-shirts, it was big enough to come down mid-thigh on him, and Itachi had no idea whether or not Sasuke had on underwear beneath the garment but he found himself enticed by the mystery.

"You're not pretending to be a girl, anymore." Itachi said, smirking at the look of shock on his brother's face. "Did you think I didn't know you were pretending?" He asked, truly curious.

"It didn't matter. The lie served it's purpose, didn't it? You never found out what Naruto was really going to say."

Itachi smiled. This was true. He still didn't know what the secret was that Sasuke held closely enough to sacrifice his masculinity for. But seeing the poor boy miserable in make-up had been too hilarious to pass up, so his foolish little brother could go on and keep his secrets for now.

"The best part," Itachi decided, "Was watching the conflict on your face, as you tried to make sure that your supposed feminism wasn't girly enough to make me lose interest. Honestly, Otouto, being slowly seduced by you this way has been an excellent experience, but you could have just asked me out on a date like a regular human being."

Sasuke smiled, and revealed his box from the Ethiopian restaurant earlier. He opened it, and set it down carefully on Itachi's end table.

"You wanted a taste?" He asked innocently, cocking his chin towards the food. Itachi nodded, slowly, if for nothing else than to see where his brother was going with this. There was a hungry glint in Sasuke's eyes that went straight to his cock, and he was quite curious to see what his brother was so desperately desiring.

Sasuke climbed onto the bed, and spread his thighs, straddling Itachi's lap. He could feel Sasuke's balls pressed against his thigh, separated only by the thin sheet that he had thrown over his legs, and deduced that there was, in fact, not a thing beneath that shirt.

Sasuke leaned in close, his breath hot and tickling against Itachi's ear in perfect time with the steady rise and fall of his chest, flush against Itachi's, so close that he could feel Sasuke's heart, which was beating rapidly.

"Let me feed it to you..." Sasuke murmured hotly into his brother's ear, his tongue flicking out slightly and brushing against the erogenous skin there, earning himself a slight hitch in Itachi's breath. "Please? I want to feel it … your tongue, hot and wet and smooth – I want to feel it against my fingers."

Itachi nodded, silently, and watched as Sasuke reached over to his box of food. It was steaming lightly, now. He must have microwaved it. The injera was soft and pliable and warm, and Sasuke used his right hand to dip it generously into the lentils, soaking up the red sauce they'd been cooked in. It dripped slightly down his fingers, but he didn't seem to notice, and placed it in front of Itachi's lips.

The elder Uchiha opened his mouth, receiving the food gratefully. Not wanting to disappoint, he dragged his tongue slowly down Sasuke's delicate hand, lapping up the streaming bits of sauce, and sucking more even after they were gone. Sasuke stuck his thumb into Itachi's mouth, running it over his teeth, gums, the inside of his cheeks. He withdrew his tongue, and inserted his middle finger instead. Longer, the slender digit easily reached the back of Itachi's throat, where he swallowed around it, instinctively.

Sasuke moaned, and trembled atop him. He could feel his younger brother's hard cock digging into his abdomen, because they were so close, and he knew that his own arousal was pressed firmly against Sasuke's deliciously plump ass, but they seemed to both be operating on some unspoken agreement to ignore their dicks for now. Which, somehow, seemed to be even more of a turn-on.

Sasuke shoved another finger into Itachi's mouth. Harder, this time. Again, Itachi swallowed around it, biting down on his brother's knuckles as punishment for the rough treatment.

Chuckling, Sasuke removed his hand, sticking it into his own mouth, and tasting Itachi's lingering saliva. To some, this probably would have been a gross thing to do, but Itachi was quite sexually excited by Sasuke's enthusiasm to taste him in whatever ways possible.

"You're supposed to be feeding me, not gagging me." Itachi announced, staring into Sasuke's eyes, and wondering why he'd ever looked anywhere else before in his life.

"Was I gagging you?" Sasuke asked, leaning in close. Their lips brushed up against each other as he spoke, and Itachi wanted nothing more than to hold him and kiss him and fall asleep just as they were. He wondered if that was normal. Oh sure, he'd already gotten past the fact that he wanted to fuck his brother. It was sick, but not unheard of. But this? What was _this _desire? To just feel Sasuke's breathing against his chest, observe the little twitchings of the boys neck as his pulse raced, feel content at the sensation of soft lips barely touching his...

This wasn't going to be just a one-off whenever they did it, Itachi realized. At some point, he had stopped being satisfied with that. Even now, with his hard cock wedged _perfectly _between two of the most gorgeous ass cheeks he'd ever had the luxury of laying eyes on – Itachi didn't want to fuck Sasuke. He wanted to kiss him.

Why was that so much more unsettling than wanting to fuck him?

"Itachi?" Sasuke asked, noticing that the man had tensed beneath him, "I didn't hurt you, did I?"

Itachi snapped back into the moment, seeing concern in Sasuke's eyes, and feeling those dainty little fingers stroking lightly at his neck, the way one would encourage another to swallow a pill.

"No," Itachi answered honestly, wrapping his arm's around Sasuke's back and pulling him closer so that he could feel their chests pressed together again. "Would you kiss me right now if I asked you to?"

Itachi could feel Sasuke smiling against his cheek. "Right now, I'd probably do _anything_ you asked me to..." He accented this statement with a gentle nudge of his hard length towards Itachi's abdomen, and whimpered at the friction.

"This morning, when you came in here, in that tiny little robe, and those stupid slippers – do you know what thought I wanted to do to you?"

Sasuke shook his head.

"I wanted to press you up against the wall, and bite into your neck so hard that it would bruise for weeks. I wanted to pull your hair, and hear you whimper for me to stop. I wanted to lift your legs up around me, and fuck you raw and fast and hard, and feel the warmth of your blood dripping down my cock as I split you open. I wanted to make you scream so loudly that our parents would run in and see what all the fuss was about, and I _wanted _them to see. I wanted _everyone_ to see, and to know, and to understand – that you'd been teasing me like a little cock-whore for all this time, and you'd finally gotten what was coming to you."

Sasuke looked at Itachi. His face was still, but there seemed to be some underlying tension in his expression. His cock went soft, and Itachi knew that he had scared him, but he didn't care, because he was being honest.

"If I deserved it so much, then why isn't that what you did to me?"

"Because I wanted to know what you had planned on doing to _me_." Itachi answered, truthfully.

"So why not now, then? Hmm?" Sasuke asked, rocking viciously (and deliciously) against Itachi's manhood, which was still against his ass. "Here I am? You want to fuck me, don't you? You deserve it. You know I want you to. So go ahead. Fuck me! Do it just like you said if that's what you want! C'mon, Itachi – go on and make me _bleed_!"

Itachi almost cried at the sight of him. Sasuke looked absolutely hysterical, and Itachi realized that even more than he'd scared the boy with his words, he had _hurt _him.

"No."

"You don't mean that, do you?" Sasuke's eyes were seductive then, and he licked his lips very slowly, and pulled the shirt off of himself. He slid his ass against Itachi's cock and released a loud moan, "Why deny yourself, Aniki? Is it that I'm too willing for you now? Would you prefer me if I tried to fight it? Do you want to see me _struggle_? Would that turn you on? Huh? Go on! Just fucking _do _it!"

"No."

"WHY?"

Itachi cleared his throat. "Later, when we were at dinner. You looked at me, and you stopped looking at anything else, and there was no table between us, and no Mom, and no Dad, and no stupid Ethiopian restaurant where I could watch you suck on your pretty little fingers. It was just your eyes, and my eyes, and I realized that maybe the reason I didn't take advantage of you this morning was that some part of me knew I hadn't wanted to in the first place."

"If you didn't want to, you wouldn't be having sick fantasies about it!"

"Sasuke, be reasonable. I'm your brother – I spend more time with you while you're alone and vulnerable than anyone else you know. If I was harboring a secret desire to rape you, I would most certainly have acted on it by now."

"Is that supposed to make me feel better?"

Itachi sighed. "I think that I'd let myself think I wanted to fuck you – really _fuck _you, not make love, not even have sex, but _fuck _you – because I was not ready to accept that there was anything aside from your body that I was attracted to. Please, don't be afraid of me. It was not a thought I actually entertained at all, it was merely something to keep in my mind – to remind myself that you are no more important than anyone else I could shove my dick into."

"Wow, thanks – that really helped." Sasuke said sarcastically.

Itachi frowned. He was not wording this properly at all...

"I have never in my life had to remind myself that I thought of someone as a plaything. I've had plenty of sex with plenty of people, and I couldn't tell you half of their names because less than half of them matter, and only _two _of them still know mine. But _you _… in these past few weeks I have see-sawed between reminding myself that you're my brother, and reminding myself that you're no one really, and all the while, I haven't really been reminding myself of anything, because all the while – you've been so much more than that."

Sasuke looked genuinely confused, now. He climbed off of Itachi's lap, and sat on the bed with his chin on his knees, and put the shirt back on, stretching out over his legs.

"You see, Otouto – when you came in tonight, and you sat down on top of me, I got so _hard, _and I felt myself, there against your ass, and do you know what I wanted?"

Though he looked scared to answer, he did. "No, I don't."

"I wanted to sleep!" Itachi laughed, and Sasuke scowled, wondering if perhaps the point of this whole speech was to humiliate him. First, he was a teasing cock-whore, then he wasn't worth the time of day, and now he wasn't even sexy to a gay man with his ass wrapped around their hard penis. Clearly, he was a failure at life, and this whole extravagant plan was to waste, and he'd given up Neji already, which basically meant that unless he could try to convince Shikamaru to be gay, he'd never have a snarky lover with long dark hair ever again.

It was not what he'd expected to do, and certainly not in front of Itachi, but suddenly it was happening and he couldn't help it:

Sasuke began to cry.

Itachi frowned deeply, and wrapped his arms around the weeping child, wondering how he'd managed to put his foot in his mouth in such a terrible way. Thinking back on it, he realized that he probably should have been a lot more clear and used a lot less words.

"You poor thing... I'm sorry. I've made a horrible mess of this, haven't I?" Itachi asked, not expecting an answer. He pulled Sasuke closer and the boy sobbed tragically into his chest.

"Hush now, Koi..." He murmured, kissing his brother's hair. "I'll try to be more direct instead of beating around the flaming bush here – Sasuke, I am completely, devoutly, _immeasurably_ in love with you."

Sasuke jerked up and stared at him. He looked shocked, and hurt, and very _very _angry. Which, is probably why Itachi was less than surprised when a second later Sasuke was very harshly slapping him in the face … twice … oh, three times.

"You! You … You _evil _fucking _bastard_!" Sasuke shrieked. "What the _hell _is fucking _wrong _with you?" Apparently the younger Uchiha saw fit to give Itachi a fourth smack for good measure. "Why are you playing with my emotions like this?" His voice got very small when he asked it, and he looked up at Itachi with such open and frightened eyes, that Itachi felt a sting much worse than any of the four slaps to the face.

"I was trying to help you see it as I saw it, but it just made everything bad and worse... I'm sorry. I truly do love you, so much so that it's hurting me to tell you simply because I know it's not what you want to hear right now."

"Itachi, how is telling me that you wanted to rape me this morning an appropriate prelude to your confession of undying love?"

"But don't you get it? I didn't want to rape you – I wanted to _want _to rape you!"

Sasuke glared. "No, Itachi. I don't get it."

"I couldn't accept that I loved you, so I tried to convince myself that it was sexual – but then you started sucking me off, and I realized that _that _was sexual, and it wasn't really what I wanted. You see? And now, with you here so close to me … I just want to hold you until I fall asleep. Do you understand?"

Sasuke simply stared at his brother, not knowing whether or not he dared believe him. He thought about it, and tried to assess his own emotions. He wasn't entirely sure whether or not he was in love with Itachi. He wasn't the sort that just fell in love with someone after watching them. He had to really get to know them romantically first, and then really _fall _in love. So, he wasn't really ready to drop those three magical words on his brother – but the idea of falling asleep beside each other did sound quite nice.

He looked over at the box of Ethiopian food, abandoned on the end table. Shyly, the younger Uchiha smiled.

"Can I … try feeding you again?" He asked, and Itachi nodded.

With a careful slowness, Sasuke tore off another piece of injera and scooping up some of the lentils along with it. He held it at his brother's lips and Itachi opened his mouth for it. Sasuke exhaled as he slid the food onto Itachi's tongue. The elder Uchiha kissed and nipped gently at the younger's fingers. He then looked up at Sasuke, and their eyes met again, and there was so much affection there between them that Sasuke couldn't help but smile.

**XxBxExLxOxVxExDxX**

Shikamaru sat down at his regular lunch table with a loud sigh, beside Ino. She was busily fussing in Sakura's hair, apparently fixing it, though Shikamaru himself didn't understand what was wrong with it in the first place.

"Is Sasuke here?"

Gaara reached over the table for a napkin, and shrugged. "He doesn't seem the type to miss the last day, but he wasn't in class this morning."

"Itachi's birthday was yesterday," Naruto explained, eyes twinkling mischievously. "Sasuke said he was gonna give him a _birthday present _last night, maybe he's worn out."

Shikamaru shook his head. "With the next edition of Akatsuki being published tomorrow there's no way Itachi would sleep in, and I doubt he'd let Sasuke sleep in if he wasn't going to."

"Are you guys talking about me?"

They all flinched a little to see that Sasuke was standing right behind Neji, who seemed to be not at all concerned with the fact that the Uchiha was softly petting his left cheek.

"Where've you been all morning?" Gaara asked, carefully peeling Sasuke's pale hands away from his lover's face.

In response, Sasuke made an obnoxious show of sitting down between them.

"I was finishing _this." _Sasuke took his laptop out of his bag and slid it across the table to Shikamaru, who opened it up and ran his eyes over the document that was already open.

"I can have it edited and back to you before the end of the day if you want it to be publishable for tomorrow's issue. What are you going to title it?"

Sasuke smirked to himself, blushing lightly. "I was thinking _Feeding Frenzy._"

**A/N: I have this weird feeling that you all hate this chapter, but review either way please, and I'd also love if you took my poll :) **

**I LOVE YOU GUYS FOR READING! SERIOUSLY I REALLY DO! **

**-Beloved**


	9. Tokumei is a Man

It was the first day of summer vacation. Sasuke had gone to sleep at three o'clock that morning, fully prepared to continue into his annual tradition of slowly working himself into a nocturnal entity by staying up later and later until eventually he saw none of the summer's sunshine. Day time was overrated anyway, and he'd always been the type to like doing it with the lights off.

Unfortunately, his mother seemed to be trying to start a new tradition of blasting classical music at ten in the morning. Which, of course, woke him from his sleep.

He took a moment to consider that perhaps this was something she usually did anyway while all of her boys were off at work and school – but then he decided he was too tired to be considerate, and should go downstairs and throw a tantrum, as he was most certainly entitled to do as a member of this household.

Grumpily, the Uchiha threw the covers off of himself, with every intention of going to tell his mother off. Then, he realized with a slight wince that he had a terrible case of morning wood going. Itachi would be at work already, and he had no desire to touch himself without some kind of audience. So, he thought graphic thoughts about his parents' private time together and tried to will the arousal away as he threw on some shorts and stomped down the stairs.

By the time he had a full view of his mother's rear, squeezed like sausage into her too-small yoga pants as she bent down to pick up something; and his ears were properly bombarded with 'Symphony No.5', the tent in his pants was completely gone.

"Mom?" He asked, as she came up with a feather duster in her hands and began to dramatically wave it around in tune to the climax of the music.

"Mom!" he hissed out again, dust flying into his eyes.

Mikoto gave a startled jump, but grinned guiltlessly at her youngest son, grabbing his hands and urging him to spin around and dance with her.

Sasuke stood still as a rock, absolutely refusing to take part in such foolishness, though his cheeks were reddening from second-hand embarrassment. How did parents manage to embarrass you when no one was even around ?

"Mom, seriously. It's way too late to try to make me smarter with baby Beethoven."

Giving up on getting him to dance, she turned it down some and laughed lightly, taking in his facial expression. "I'll try Moonlight Sonata next time, might be easier for you to sleep through."

"Please don't," He clipped out, walking over to the stereo and turning the damn song all the way off. It was making him antsy.

"Is this what you normally do during the weekdays?" He questioned, "Play hard-core classical music and dust the living room?"

"Every now and then," She answered with a shrug, walking into the kitchen and motioning for Sasuke to sit down in front of a steaming fresh plate of pancakes. "But this time I was actually trying to wake you up. Eat quickly because Itachi wants you at his office in…" She paused to glance at the clock on the stove, "Twenty six minutes."

"What!" Sasuke exclaimed, his third forkful of pancake clattering onto the table, "I can't be dressed and ready to leave the house on such short notice! Why didn't you wake me up earlier?"

"He only called to say he needed you down there a couple minutes ago, I woke you right away." She answered somewhat impatiently. "He sounded very abnormal on the phone, so I'd suggest not upsetting him further if you've already done something. You haven't played a prank on him, have you? I thought you'd grown out of that period…"

Sasuke went into a bit of a panic. He knew that after his most recent Tokumei article it would be a bit obvious – well, more obvious than usual – who the mystery writer was, but he was hoping that after Itachi's confession of love, it would just be laughed off.

Unable to beat down the anxiety, he rushed upstairs and tried to get ready as quickly as possible. He managed a ten minute shower and put on the same shorts and a mint-green V-Neck that was already kind of falling out of his wardrobe. The first pair of flip-flops that caught his eye completed the outfit, and he ran out of the front door with only four minutes to spare, yelling back to his mother that he was borrowing her car, and ignoring her shouted response that he most certainly was not.

Itachi's office was truly within walking distance, so driving it hardly took Sasuke two minutes to get there. However, by the time he was parked, he was already two minutes late. He knew he'd be in deep shit for taking the car if his mother snitched to his father, but he'd deal with that later, because he'd rather face Fugaku's wrath than Itachi's.

When he got buzzed into the office, his brother was standing by the window, looking out at the people walking down the street, it seemed. Sasuke could tell by his body language that Itachi wasn't really looking at anything at all, rather, he was lost in his own mind.

"You're late," The elder man said quietly. He didn't seem to be expecting an explanation, so Sasuke didn't offer one. "Sit."

Sasuke moved to sit down in one of the chairs in front of his brother's desk.

"No, not there," Itachi redirected, without having turned around, "Sit in my chair."

Mildly confused, Sasuke walked around the desk, towards the plush computer chair on the far side. He passed by his brother as he did so, and enjoyed the warmth and tension that emitted from the man's smooth back – covered as it was by a shirt and suit-jacket.

It was a simple thing to see, when Sasuke sat down in front of Itachi's computer. It was a word document, and it was blank. Not a single letter written on it, or a single sound from either of their lips to explain its presence, and yet it spoke so loudly that he wished to cover his ears.

Itachi knew. He knew everything.

"You've found out my secret, I see." Sasuke remarked, trying to keep his voice light and playful though he was caught somewhere between the emotional state of a spooked horse and a frightened baby.

"Don't." Itachi cut off his brother's attempted liveliness with a single word.

He turned around and walked up behind Sasuke, resting his arms on the younger Uchiha's shoulders and leaning his head in near his ear. He kissed the soft skin on Sasuke's neck, and let his arms run down the teen's chest and stomach.

"Here's what is going to happen," Itachi whispered, heavily, "I am going to fuck you on this desk," He slapped his hand hard against the sturdy wood, and Sasuke gasped, "You will enjoy it. Greatly."

Sasuke felt arousal curling slow and hot in the pit of his stomach, and nodded.

"And then," Itachi continued, "You are going to write out every single thing that I did to you, and I am going to publish it, and those filthy little friends of yours are going to read every filthy word and know exactly what you wrote about."

Sasuke smirked slyly. "If this is meant as some sort of punishment, I'd like to give you a heads-up that I'm really liking the sound of it."

Itachi chuckled darkly, almost to himself. "Yes, well, we haven't gotten to the fun bits." He moved away from Sasuke, and began to remove items from his desk. One by one, things were placed elsewhere about the room. First, a tin of pens was put onto the windowsill. Next, a stack of paperwork relocated to one of the other chairs.

Object after object transferred about the room, plucked up from Itachi's slender fingers.

Sasuke watched.

It was all the anticipation of watching a lover get undressed, but somehow magnified by the sheer knowledge that if someone were to walk through that door, or look through that window, they would be completely unaware of the hidden perversion behind his brother's movements. Perhaps he was just tidying. Who was to say he was preparing for a more twisted act?

Itachi retrieved a dust-cloth from a cabinet to Sasuke's right, and began running the thick-fibered fabric over the face of the desk, though in Sasuke's opinion, it was plenty clean already.

"I don't mind a little dirt under the nails, you know," He commented, eyes glued to Itachi's hands.

"I do."

Sasuke shrugged, and moved to stand up, irritated by all the waiting.

"I told you to sit," Itachi reminded, making direct eye contact with his little brother.

"And I heard you," Sasuke acknowledged, "It was a thoughtful suggestion, but I'll be standing now, thanks."

Itachi's eyes followed Sasuke. The boy was walking up to him, and his face was a perfect mask of confidence and fearlessness. Itachi took in the mask, adored it, respected it, and then began to pick at the cracks. They were molecular; hair-line fractures tightly placed together with the strongest crazy-glue that a teenager's mind could muster. Itachi widened them with a squint of the eye, and peered into their depths. Confusion. Hurt. Desperation. Need. Loneliness. Apprehension. Fright. Exhaustion. Passion. Drive. Defiance. Submission. The qualities that made up Sasuke Uchiha. The pieces to the puzzle that he hid away, hoping no one would ever put them together. Itachi assembled them all, and looked at the masterpiece before him.

"I see you," He murmured lowly, knowing that with Sasuke's current proximity there was no need to project his voice. They were standing closely now, almost chest to chest, their eyes still tied together with some haunted immovable line.

"I'm not hiding," Sasuke whispered back, breaking their eye contact to glance down at Itachi's mouth.

"You are," Itachi responded at the same volume, leaning in even closer, and resting his forehead on Sasuke's, "You're hiding like a child - covering up your own eyes because you think it means I won't be able to find you."

He wrapped his arms around the younger Uchiha's waist, pulling him forward that last inch so that they were really touching, pressed so tightly together that the speedy pattering of Sasuke's heartbeat hardly felt foreign against his own.

"But you're right here," Itachi finished. Finally - finally pressing their lips against each other's, so lightly that it barely differed from the warmth of his breath.

"I love you," The words were spoken into Sasuke's lips, swallowed down his throat and trickling through his veins, warm under his skin. He stepped back, stung with the burn of them.

"Yes, you said that already. The day before yesterday," He responded, shakily. He didn't like Itachi talking about all this love business; the entire idea was ridiculous.

"Hmm, so I did," He looked at the space Sasuke had created between them, but knew better than to comment on the younger man's obvious discomfort with anything remotely emotional. Instead, he patted his hand against the desk. "Take a seat? I'm asking this time, truly."

Obediently, Sasuke sat down on the desk. This time, he didn't flinch away when Itachi got close. He allowed the elder Uchiha to stand between his legs. In fact, he secured them firmly around Itachi's back, giving the illusion that he was capable of trapping the man there.

He could feel Itachi's breathing, as he brought himself closer, his face hovered beside Sasuke's neck, and he adorned the soft skin with a long lick of his tongue. Making a satisfied sound that seemed to come from deep in his chest, he sucked a little harder.

Sasuke, no stranger to this sort of thing, was able to tell the exact moment that a bruise began to form.

"I can't go around in scarves during the summer, Nii-San," He huffed out, rolling his eyes.

Itachi snorted, "As if you've never come home covered in love-bites before,"

"Yes, but it's a bit different when Mother knows exactly where I am, don't you think?" Sasuke retorted, trying to keep his voice steady through Itachi's continuous sucks and nibbles.

He was ignored.

Strong, callused fingers began toying coyly with the hem of his shirt, and he lifted his arms some, allowing Itachi to remove the V-Neck with one pull. He threw it, and it landed in front of the window. They both looked over, and recalled at the same moment that Itachi's office was street-level. Luckily, they hadn't attracted any visible voyeurs as of yet.

"Stay," Itachi commanded, giving Sasuke a peck on the nose and going to close the blinds and lock the door. He paused to just look at Sasuke for a moment, not wanting to approach him just yet. He took in the man-child's appearance, bare chested, a deep purple mark forming on his neck, body shivering with anticipation, but breathing slow because he was trying to hide it.

"You really are quite easy on the eyes, Otouto."

"I know," He replied with annoyance, "But as much fun as your eyes are having over there, I'd much prefer you appreciated my body with an altogether different part of your anatomy."

Itachi laughed, but complied, coming closer and standing in front of Sasuke. He was at a teasing distance, just far enough away that Sasuke couldn't comfortably reach out and touch him from the desk. He took off his suit jacket, folded it, and laid it down on the same chair he'd put the paperwork on earlier. Next, off came the button down. Unable to resist at least trying, Sasuke stretched his arm out, wanting to undo the buttons himself, but only barely able to even brush his fingers against them.

"That's cruel and unusual," He muttered, more to himself than anyone else.

This earned an even deeper laugh from Itachi, who was now letting his shirt fall to the floor.

"What, you fold the jacket and let the shirt just drop?"

"I'm losing my patience, is all."

Sasuke smiled, managing to catch Itachi's hips in his hands for just long enough to pull the man closer.

"Well, I never had any in the first place," He responded, toying with the top of his brother's pants, then unzipping them, "Here's an idea, _you _get on the desk and lean back and relax and let me get another taste of that delightful cock of yours."

Itachi laughed, nudging Sasuke playfully backwards so that he was lying flat against the desktop.

"As much as I enjoyed my … _birthday licks_," He began with a slow smirk, pulling down Sasuke's shorts and snorting quietly at his brother's lack of undergarment.

Finally, the boy was completely naked, and laying exquisitely before him. His cock was semi-hard, resting lazily against his stomach. Sasuke himself was propped up on his elbows, staring curiously at his still half-dressed elder brother, as if daring him to make his next move.

Itachi dragged his hands over Sasuke's sides, taking in the gentle ridges of his ribs, and admiring the soft skin stretched so tightly against them. He let his caress move upwards, running his fingertips against Sasuke's collar bone, then dipping down his chest to press lightly on his stomach.

Sasuke shivered, goose-pimples erupting all over his flesh, only to be quickly soothed away by the warmth of Itachi's touch. He could feel Itachi's eyes on him, nearly as hot with their stare as his hands were.

He bit his lip, refusing to whimper as Itachi's thumb toyed cruelly in his bellybutton for a moment. The hand moved lower, resting against the base of his penis but refusing to make actual contact. Sasuke was absolutely not going to beg. It wasn't going to happen. He stared hard at Itachi's face, trying to make it clear with his eyes.

Itachi chuckled, climbing up onto the desk himself on his knees and leaning over the younger Uchiha predatorily. He rested his slightly chapped lips on Sasuke's shoulder, kissing gently at the clammy skin and then biting softly into it, grinning when Sasuke released a small gasp.

He got back to work with his hand, cupping Sasuke's balls and massaging them slowly, letting his middle finger push enticingly at his perineum.

A growl was forming deep in Sasuke's chest and Itachi felt it trembling against his lips, which were slowly migrating downwards from his brother's shoulder. When he got to his targeted destination, he rested his cheek lightly on Sasuke's cock, like a mother checking for fever. Sasuke was harder than he had been when he'd first been pushed down, but still not quite throbbing the way Itachi wanted to see him. He gripped the teen's sac tighter, finally earning a real moan.

The cock against his cheek twitched, and Sasuke mewled with need. Itachi decided to take pity on the child, and ran a slow lick up the now throbbing muscle. He licked kittenishly at the head, and placed an open mouthed kiss against the eye, giving a grunt of pleasure when he received a warm dribble of precum for his efforts. He gathered it onto his tongue and savored it, which inspired another sharp intake of breath from Sasuke, who was watching him very closely.

"Am I doing okay?" He half-questioned, half-mocked, pausing to shove the entire length of Sasuke's manhood down his throat. His throat fluttered and he swallowed around the head, then let it fall back out of his mouth, "I know you're the expert, after all."

"Shut up," The younger Uchiha demanded, rolling his eyes.

"Turn over," Itachi requested in the same tone.

Sasuke complied without question, rolling over so that he was on his stomach atop the desk, wincing slightly at the way his boner dug uncomfortably into the wood. Itachi paid his discomfort no mind, and leaned over his back, tracing his spine lightly with his tongue before spreading open the cheeks of his ass.

He gazed at the tiny opening and ran his finger experimentally over the crinkled skin, watching it pulse with anticipation. Reaching into his pocket, he retrieved the small tube of lubricant that he'd picked up on his way to work, and drizzled some over Sasuke's delectably pink little rosebud.

He kneaded the gooey substance over the fleshy area with practiced care, and slowly eased a single finger in, gasping at the impossible tightness.

"Careful," Sasuke yelped out at barely a whisper. Itachi heard it, though. He slowed his movements further, moving with extreme care and feeling Sasuke's sphincter clutching desperately at his index finger.

"It's so _tight._" He hissed out in wonder, "When was the last time you-"

"Never." Sasuke interrupted, fingers clutching with panic at the wood of the desk, "I've always been the one who – I mean, I've never let anyone-"

Immediately Itachi pulled the finger out, and lifted Sasuke into his arms, kissing him fiercely. "You gorgeous, _hopeless, _little fool…" He murmured against his brother's bruised lips, biting them hard and then stabbing at the warm orifice with his tongue, groaning into the heat of Sasuke's mouth. The younger Uchiha was trembling in his grasp, nervous beyond belief.

"I'm sorry…" Sasuke breathed out, clinging to Itachi's chest, "I can't seem to stop shaking … this is really embarrassing."

Itachi merely hugged him tighter, and then gently laid him back down on his back, kissing him soundly. "There's nothing embarrassing about it," He assured, using his already lubed hand to stroke at his and Sasuke's cocks, now pressed together in this new position. Sasuke's was slightly deflated, and he twisted and jerked at it with renewed enthusiasm, getting it back to its previous state of arousal.

"As a matter of fact, I'm quite honored."

"Shut up, Aniki. I'm hardly a virgin."

Itachi didn't answer, choosing instead to kiss the boy again. He coaxed Sasuke's tongue into his mouth and let it explore as he slipped his finger back in – even more slowly than the first time. This time, the almost unbearable tightness was expected, and he could feel his cock hardening further just at the thought that somehow it was going to fit in there.

Sasuke's body tensed again at the intrusion, but Itachi did not desist.

"I've got you," He whispered against Sasuke's lips, covering them with his own. They kissed lazily, and Itachi took his time, taking the one single finger that was embedded in his brother out and then pushing it back in again, repeating the process until he could do it without Sasuke wincing, and then repeating it over again.

"More?" He asked quietly.

Sasuke took a moment to assess himself and then nodded. Itachi squeezed a fresh dosage of lubricant onto his fingers and then carefully eased two of them into his brother.

"Oh!" Sasuke's eyes widened exponentially and his nails dug into Itachi's shoulders. He relaxed much more swiftly than after the first breach and then closed his eyes, feeling the pressure on his inner walls start to inspire a curling in his stomach. He purred lightly, and began to push down against the finger with a leisurely rhythm.

Itachi was massaging against his prostate with one finger, as if to distract from the incessant stretching he was doing with the other. It was working. Sasuke sighed heavily, and his eye lashes fluttered as his vision blurred. The pleasure built in a completely different way than it did when he was on top – it swirled like a menacing fury, threatening to take over each and every cell in his body.

Itachi smiled, entering Sasuke with a third finger, knowing that he was ready.

"_Kami_!" Sasuke hissed out, bucking down against the new sensation, "Whoever said three's a crowd was lying," He commented, holding onto Itachi's waist for a bit of leverage as he shoved himself down harder on the exploring digits. "Can you? … Urgh… Move them faster?" He asked, opening his eyes and staring up at Itachi pleadingly.

Unable to resist such a well-deserved request, Itachi obediently increased the speed of his hand, biting his lip when it caused Sasuke to begin moaning wantonly. He was glad that Sasuke was feeling good, and refused to think of the horror that this even could have been if his brother hadn't been open about his lack of experience. Itachi wasn't exactly a patient and gentle lover by nature.

"Are you ready?" He asked, not able to ignore the severe neglect that his own body was enduring.

"Oh, yes. Please!" Sasuke answered, "In fact, I absolutely insist."

Rolling his eyes, Itachi withdrew his hand, rubbing the remainder of his travel-sized container of lubricant onto his cock, trying hot to make any vocal recognition of how pleasant his own hand felt against the pulsing heat.

He eased himself into Sasuke's hole, one millimeter at a time it seemed. For a moment, he was going to tell Sasuke to push down, but he could feel that the uke was already doing exactly that – doubtlessly, having given the same instruction countless times, and thus not needing it to be said to him.

It took nearly two minutes of cautious shallow thrusting for Itachi to finally be fully sheathed in Sasuke's body. He stilled then, observing the sensation of his balls pressing warmly against Sasuke's cleft. He kissed Sasuke's neck, rubbing soothing indistinguishable shapes against his sides until the tension alleviated.

"Alright," Sasuke said, taking a breath and holding it while Itachi pulled out and then pushed back into him. They both groaned in satisfaction. Sasuke was fascinated by the way that being filled so utterly and completely felt like letting go of every single worry he'd ever had all at once. He mourned the loss of Itachi's shaft each time it pulled out, only to be thrown back into a world of euphoria each time it was slammed back in – harder with every thrust now, and speeding up gradually.

Eventually, they worked themselves up to an agreeable pace, and Itachi held firmly to the sides of the desk as he pounded relentlessly into his brother. Sasuke was shouting out swears with every single thrust, caught in a haze of heat and lust. There was nothing more important than getting even closer to Itachi – though it was not actually possible.

"I wanna ride it," He announced, batting his eyelashes in mock innocence at Itachi's raised eyebrow. The elder Uchiha nodded, and pulled out, then sat down on his desk chair, motioning with his hands for Sasuke to take a seat on his lap.

Sasuke stretched his back as he hopped off of the desk, and slipped his legs under the open arms of the chair, then sat himself down on Itachi's cock.

"That hits a good spot," He murmured, rocking his hips. "Mm… Yeah, this is nice." He rocked faster, panting heavily when he felt Itachi's cock poke deliciously at that spot inside of him that'd had him seeing stars earlier.

He began to bounce, moaning with delight as he repeatedly impaled himself, hitting just the right spot almost every other time.

Itachi had his hands placed on the arms of the chair, watching his brother use his cock. His own breath began to become short as he observed the way Sasuke wound his body about, seeking his own pleasure with an adorable lack of concern for whether or not Itachi was gaining anything from his frantic motions. Sasuke's own cock was bouncing joyously, slapping against Itachi's belly and thus splashing it with a glob of precum.

Unable to resist, he grabbed Sasuke by his thighs, lifting him up and back onto the desk in a single motion, now so that Itachi was standing up, still deeply inside of Sasuke, who was propping himself up with his arms on the desk, his legs around Itachi's waist.

Almost carelessly, Itachi removed the legs from his waist, pushing Sasuke down onto his back and putting the boy's legs over his shoulders to that he could push into him with the urgency he needed to.

They fucked wildly, beads of sweat forming along their foreheads and backs, hearing nothing but the low moans and grunts accompanied by the rhythmic slapping of Itachi's balls.

"Oh fuck … so close…" Sasuke whimpered, clawing his nails into the previously unmarked wood and making tiny ridges that they both momentarily ignored as suddenly his climax was upon him, washing over his entire existence like tsunami coming to destroy all delusions of what he had once thought an orgasm felt like.

He became aware, suddenly, that he was screaming, and that Itachi had stopped moving inside of him, instead petting softly at his forehead.

The elder Uchiha was absolutely entranced. Sasuke seemed to have surprised himself with the sheer force of his release, screeching out incoherently and convulsing against the now-clammy surface of his desk. He reached up franticly to Itachi and pulled him close, trembling with wonder. His eyes wide and glassy, and watering a little.

His ass was clenching and fluttering and with a final groan, Itachi spilled himself inside of the warm cavern.

When Sasuke finally caught his breath he was hardly even aware of where he was.

"I'm sorry, Nii-San, but there is no possible way that even Tokumei could put _that _into words." He said, watching Itachi attentively slip his softening cock out of him. He could feel his hole winking in distress at the loss, and hoped they could repeat this endeavor at a later point that day – hopefully they could get their parents out of the house.

"I'm sure you'll manage. _Tokumei _owes me that much for all the stress she's caused."

Sasuke huffed. "You _still _think it's a woman!"

Itachi shrugged, pulling his pants up nonchalantly. "What can I say? She's still a little bitch."

"Itachi, you will acknowledge that you were wrong and Tokumei is a man or I swear to all that is holy in this world I will bend you over this desk and show you just how real his cock is!"

Giving another shrug, Itachi looked his brother in the eye, grinning deviously.

"Perhaps another time, Otouto," He conceded, "I find myself to be better acquainted with your cock already. I admit that Tokumei is a boy – _my _boy to be specific."

Pouting, Sasuke crossed his arms. "Not a boy! A man!"

"Now you're pushing it," Itachi argued, fingering at the new markings on his desk with annoyance. "But I suppose I can agree to the small detail of you being a _man, _as long as we are both clear on the fact that you're _mine._" He growled.

Sasuke grinned beautifully, staring deeply into his brother's eyes, playful banter forgotten. "There is no one in the world who I would rather belong to."

**A/N: Another chapter done! The next one's the last. **

**Please review if you have any feedback and take my poll if it pleases your fancy. **

**I love you all dearly! **

**-Beloved**


	10. Devotion

**A/N: This is the last chapter everyone! You're in for a lot of fluff, just to warn you. **

**Enjoy!**

* * *

><p>If there was one thing that Shikamaru Nara was an expert on, it was Sasuke Uchiha. They'd been best friends for an unreasonable amount of time, and it showed. This was how he was so certain in this moment that Sasuke did not want to talk about what was bothering him. It was also how Shikamaru knew, without a doubt, that Sasuke <em>needed <em>to talk. In addition to that, he was privileged with a good bit of knowledge on what was disturbing his friend in the first place.

"Did he not read it yet?"

Sasuke groaned, and buried his face in his hands.

"He never does. Ever since we started fucking and I wrote the article about our first time, he's been waiting for the print before he'll even peek."

Shikamaru sighed. He knew that Sasuke was anxious for Itachi to read the latest Tokumei article. After all, he was Sasuke's personal editor. Knowing what Sasuke had written, he could see how waiting would be more than nerve-wracking.

"Maybe you should just tell him? It's more personal that way, you know."

"I don't _want _it to be personal!" Sasuke whined, "I want it to be deep but still extravagant."

At that, the Nara rolled his eyes, "Itachi's known you for your whole life, and he's been in a monogamous relationship with you for coming on eight months now. I think it's fair to assume that he has seen _plenty _of your extravagance at this point. There's no need to try impressing him with _that _approach."

"It's not about impressing him," Sasuke argued, "It's about letting him know that I'm just as passionate about him as I am about myself. He needs to understand that he's _worth _my constant extravagance."

Shikamaru gave Sasuke an incredulous look, "You got his eye tattooed on your neck literally the _day _you got together and that wasn't enough to show him that your relationship is worth extravagance?"

Sasuke exhaled irritably, "I've told you time and time again, Shika! The damn bastard gave me a big ass hickey and it wasn't scarf season! I had to cover it somehow or my mother would have freaked at both of us!"

"You know, even though it's far from the first time that you've given me that explanation, I still think it was fucking stupid of you."

Sasuke pouted and released a large huff of breath.

"I don't want to tell him. I want him to just read the damn article already."

Shikamaru could see that Sasuke didn't have much fight left in him on the subject, and thought it would be going too far to push it. With a casual nod, he just left it at that.

**XxBxExLxOxVxExDxX**

Sasuke didn't really realize he'd fallen asleep until someone started waking him up. He shifted slightly, twitching his brow as a gentle kiss was placed on his forehead.

"I know you're awake," A familiar voice murmured against his neck, "Did you tell Mom you're here?"

"Mmhm," He responded, yawning a little and running his fingers through his lover's hair, "She gave me that lecture again though."

Itachi laughed breathily, quite familiar with Mikoto's speech about how ever since her first born son moved out, she hardly ever saw either of them anymore.

"She's just gonna have to get used to it if she still won't budge about letting you live here," He said, running his lips down Sasuke's cheek and pecking his nose.

Alas, Sasuke caved into awareness and opened his eyes, surprised with Itachi's eyes were looking right into his. They laid there, staring at each other for a moment, and Sasuke licked his lips nervously.

"Itachi, I…" He paused, shutting his eyes again for a moment. "Shikamaru came over this morning and woke me up kind of early. That's why I took a nap as soon as I got here."

"…Okay," Itachi replied, raising an eyebrow. Clearly, he had noticed that there was something else Sasuke had started to say, but he ignored it.

"Did you, um, read the new print of Akatsuki today?"

The elder Uchiha shook his head. "That's why I wasn't home when you got here. I've been with the printer all last night and this morning. There was a problem with the cover image and the new issue won't be published until tomorrow. Why do you ask? Should I be bracing myself for something absurdly scandalous in the Tokumei panel?"

"I guess that's one way to put it," Sasuke heaved out, grumpily.

He was ready for Itachi to read what he'd fucking written! He put a lot of time and effort into that article, and it wasn't … well, it wasn't like the others.

* * *

><p>That time the next day, he still had it on his mind. He and Itachi were trying to play monopoly, but he kept getting distracted.<p>

"_How _much do I owe you?" He asked for what must have been the fifth time in a row.

Itachi merely smiled patiently, "Two-thousand,"

"You _would _have a hotel on Boardwalk," Sasuke fumed, thumbing through his money to see if he even had enough.

Itachi frowned. "Are you alright?" he inquired, furrowing his brow slightly, "It kind of seems like you've been mad at me all weekend."

Sasuke wasn't trying to openly bitch at his brother, but the damn man hadn't gotten a copy of _Akatsuki _today either, and now it was published! But no, Itachi had wanted to spend _time _with him! Couldn't they spend time together reading or something? This was getting really out of hand.

"I don't think my mind is in the right place for organized activity," He tried to explain, "I'm too broke for your hotel anyway. Wanna go see a movie or something?"

Itachi agreed, and started looking at show times near them, but Sasuke figured by his facial expression that nothing good was showing.

"Hey, what's playing at that oldies theater downtown tonight?"

"Hold on," Itachi acknowledged, clicking away at his phone, "Er, it's Gone with the Wind."

Sasuke grinned, "Well get dressed, Rhett. We're going."

Several hours of the deep south, and two over-priced pretzel's later, Sasuke was really starting to lose patience with his brother's complete apathy towards this month's Tokumei panel.

"Now what do you want to do?" Itachi asked, buckling himself into the car and looking at the less than pleased person in his passenger seat.

"Don't you want to make sure that everything went okay with the cover image?"

Itachi shrugged. "I'm sure Konan would have let me know by now if there was an issue."

Sasuke groaned and decided to begin drafting is will when they got back to either of their houses. His brother was definitely going to be the death of him, and at this rate – he might just drop dead any second.

"Are you _sure _there isn't anything you just want to tell me, Otouto?" Itachi sang out, smiling joyfully.

"Yes I'm sure dammit!" Sasuke barked, kicking his legs up on the dashboard and leaning his chair back. He refused to cave in and say it. He absolutely would not say it.

Itachi chuckled, but let his brother keep his secrets, and drove the boy home silently. When they pulled into the driveway, he turned to Sasuke and saw that the teen was still moodily glaring out of the window.

"Could I have a kiss goodnight before your friends steal you away?" He asked, already able to hear that loud-mouthed Naruto in the living rom.

Sasuke leaned over and pressed his lips to Itachi's, slipping his tongue in smoothly and sighing with relief at the familiar taste of his lover's tongue. He truly cherished Itachi's kisses, and though he was a bit pissed off with the man at that moment, he had to admit that he was loathed to part with him either way.

"Pick me up tomorrow?" He pleaded, their mouths still brushing softly together with each syllable, "Please? I can't stand the thought of a single moment without you," He kissed him again for good measure, and to make sure that Itachi didn't just answer right away and say no.

"I love you," Was Itachi's response, and Sasuke felt a fluttering in his chest, "Call me as soon as you wake up, I'll come drive you to school."

Right. It was Monday tomorrow. Their mother wouldn't let him spend a weeknight at Itachi's house, which totally SUCKED and was completely unfair, but he had to pick his battles. He couldn't constantly be fighting her about being allowed to move in with his brother officially if he was already never home.

Kissing Itachi one more time just because he couldn't bear not to, he got out of the car and went into his house, not at all ready to face his crazy-retarded friends, but not really having another choice.

As Itachi pulled off, he noticed that Sasuke had left something behind. He pulled over around the corner to see what it was and snorted. All day the kid had been bugging him to get a copy of _Akatsuki _and low and behold the little bugger had already bought one!

Figuring that Sasuke must have been anxious about the slut-level of the Tokumei article this month, he took a deep breath and skipped to the very back:

**Dangers of Devotion  
><strong>_**by Tokumei-Chan**_

_My darling readers, this month I would like to shine some light on a bit of a touchy topic. As I'm sure you have realized by now: yours truly is not excruciatingly tight-lipped on subjects of sexuality. In fact, I'll admit myself to be downright robust (if people are using words like 'robust' anymore.) I am far from shy, and greatly enjoy every possible activity that I can describe using the words 'suck, fuck, lick,' and especially – especially – 'cum'._

_However, there is a word that I tend to be a little reluctant about. That word, if you haven't guessed by now, is 'love.' Truly, I am appalled to have even just typed the damn thing! It's not even in my basic vocabulary. I am mildly surprised that I can even spell it. So, imagine my shock when I realized I am capable of feeling it!_

_Now, don't get too impressed here. I didn't just learn to feel love all by myself. I had a LOT of help, from a certain man in my life (who shall remain anonymous, as I am.) He tended to my emotions, nursed my heart back to health, and sheltered the sweet side of me from my own jaded eyes. He is strong, intelligent, and – my god – he is beautiful. When he speaks to me, it's like my favorite song just came on the radio after a long day. When he smiles, I see a midnight sky lit up with fireworks. The way that I feel when he touches me is impossible to capture with words alone._

_And I love him. Oh, I love him. With every ounce of me I love him._

_Now here's the magical part – he loves me too!_

_So what advice can I give you lovely devoted readers in this panel? Here it is: Don't waste as much time as I have worrying about who can set your body on fire, or who makes you orgasm so hard that you forget your name. Find the person who sets your body on fire with their eyes alone. Pick the one who never makes you forget your name, because you are too anxiously obsessing over the miraculous way it sounds falling from their lips._

_To be crude – if they don't love you as hard as they fuck you, they're a waste of effort. Find someone who adores you to their very core. Someone whose presence makes you unable to fathom a world without them. That's what I did, and I've never been happier._

_Now put down the mag and go get him, gals!_

_**-Tokumei**_

When Itachi finished reading the article, he almost couldn't catch his breath. He turned the car right back around and burst into his old front door and up the steps two at a time just so that he could see his brother. When he got to Sasuke's room, he picked the boy up in his arms and spun him around.

"I love you too," He whispered into his ear, kissing his precious Otouto hard on the lips and not stopping until he noticed someone was clearing their throat.

Sasuke's room was, as usual, full of his friends – though Itachi hadn't noticed.

Neji Hyuuga was smirking at him, and the red-headed one looked thoroughly relieved for some reason.

"We're gonna wait downstairs!" The blonde girl peeped out, grabbing two other people's hands as they all exited the room together.

Itachi ignored their migration and kissed his daring little lover again, "Say it," He breathed into Sasuke's lips, "Tell me. I want to hear it."

"I love you," Sasuke marveled, "I love you, I love you, I love you," He beamed, laughing outrageously, "God I've been wanting to tell you for weeks!"

"I want you to tell me every day for as long as we both live," Itachi answered, holding him tight. "One more time?" He pleaded.

Sasuke was glad to repeat himself. Again, and again, until the moments in which he spoke those three little words turned into hours, and the hours to days, and the days to years, and still he did not ever tire of saying it.

And Itachi did not tire of listening.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Okay so not the best ending chapter, but I tried. I know it's fluffy, but keep in mind that this chapter takes place several months after the last one, so the brothers relationship has settled a bit and is more domestic. **

**THIS WAS THE LAST CHAPTER OF THIS FIC ITS DONE NOW NO SEQUEL I'M SORRY BUT I HOPE YOU LIKED IT! **

**Thank You to all those who have reviewed and alerted, and thank you to anyone who will review this chapter as well. **

**I love each and every one of you for reading! **

**-Beloved**


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